The Control Freak Chronicles

My Cat is a Genius

2011-12-27T12:53:00.001-05:00

Cheese is the best cat ever. I know it is all selfish cat stuff that he is doing, but he apparently likes the same stuff I do, and he has a certain knowledge that is timeless and just makes sense.

I couldn’t sleep last night. I had had a really bad day and by the time I fell into bed around 11:30 I had so much anxiety that I was convinced someone close to me was going to die. That being said, trying to fall asleep was a challenge. I know that animals reduce stress so I called Autumn and she came over and slept in her favorite spot (snuggled up against my neck). I petted her a bit and started to doze off. And then the twitching started (mine, not hers). Every time I got close to slipping off, I would twitch, it would wake me up and I would start the whole worrying process again. I thought maybe I was too hot so I kicked the covers off. The problem with that is that the boys were laying on my legs – Bumpers between my knees and Cheese against my thigh. This meant that they had to move with the covers, or get up and reposition. After having to reposition about 5 times Bumpers finally gave up and left. Cheese, However, walked up the side of my body and plopped his 18 pound, fuzzy, butt right on my side. And he has claws, so he dug in. I am a smart girl and I know at this point, if I thrash around some more, it is going to result in 20 claws embedded in my side because he is trying to hold on, so I lay as still as I could to avoid any bloodletting. That, and the purring, fuzzy, warm weight of nearly 20 pounds holding me down finally relaxed me enough that I fell asleep. I don’t know when he left, but when I woke up this morning he was back in his usual spot being all purry and cute.

I know how much it helped me, but I don’t know if he did it out of kitteh selfishness or maybe he knows something I don’t. Either way, I was able to get to sleep around 2 for a good 5 hours of sleep. Considering everything, I think that is pretty good.

Cheese is getting some chicken with his meal tonight.

Going Full Morlock

2011-09-26T10:55:00.001-04:00

Ya know, sometimes I feel like a Morlock. You remember the Morlocks - Those troll like creatures that lived underground in the book, The Time Machine by H.G.Wells. And yes, some morning I probably look like one too. Lol.

If you aren’t familiar, In the book by Wells, in the distant future civilization branched into 2 distinct directions. One group headed underground and became hideous, troll like creatures who were regarded with terror. The other group, the Eloi, stayed in the sunshine and were beautiful and cared for and lived a simple life with no worries. The Morlocks ruled the underground by mining and engineering tunnels and mechanized devises (hard work). The Eloi were provided for, swam and played, and didn’t have a care in the world (other than the Morlocks). It was originally thought that the relationship between the Eloi and Morlocks was that of Lord/Servant or perhaps a perfect Communist society. However, it turns out it was more Rancher/Cattle with the Eloi as the beautiful, vacuous cattle.

Which brings me back to the title of this blog…I really feel that in our society today, the educated are regarded as the Morlocks and the beautiful/young people are the Eloi. Those of us with an education work hard, make (mostly) sound decisions, and make things work for the Eloi. The Eloi, on the other hand, stand around being beautiful, not needing their brains, and are completely catered to. Yes I know there are some exceptions to the rule. I know beautiful Morlocks and I also know some ugly Eloi. But what characterizes the Eloi is that they are just fucking ignorant and don’t see a need to better themselves because they get by on the graces of others.

That being said, I have decided to go full Morlock. I have been toying with the idea for about a year now. I am in a good place (hopefully this doesn’t jinx it) now and I feel this is the time to just jump into the underground and embrace my Morlock-ness…I have decided to get my Master’s in Finance and get my CPA. Fortunately, the majority of my friends are Morlocks as well, so they understand the commitment and work it is going to take. When I get overwhelmed (and I always do during finals) I just have to keep reminding myself that it is the Morlocks that ultimately control things…and eventually we eat the Eloi…heh…heh…heh.

Anniversary Thoughts

2010-05-06T20:43:00.004-04:00

Being married isn't all flowers and chocolates...sometimes it is all clean the house and take the cat to the vet. It's the very small things that nurture love, not the large gestures. When Michael rubs my back in his sleep, it means more to me than if he gave me flowers. When he puts gas in my car, it tells me he is thinking about my comfort and convenience enough to make that extra effort. When I do something for him it isn't about the recognition, it is about the reward of knowing it makes him a little happier.

When we first got married, it was just the two of us, half a country away from anyone we knew - we were a team and it was us against the world. As we got comfortable and grew into who we were, we grew together, sometimes at different paces, but we did it as a team. I have always known that Michael would support me even if he didn't agree with me or my decisions. I have always known that Michael would do anything for me if I asked. He loves me to distraction...still. It is such a powerful, and at the same time, humbling feeling to know and to acknowledge this.

He is the Rocky to my Bullwinkle, the Right to my Left, the Snoopy to my Charlie Brown. Every day that I get to spend time with him is a day well spent. I have never doubted that I adore him and want him to be happy. There were times when I doubted myself - but never Michael. He is as solid, as permanent, and as strong as a mountain (and as stubborn).

Happy Anniversary, Michael.

For the past 23 years you have been my Voice of Reason, my Co-Conspirator, Friend, Lover, Chauffeur, Warmer of the Sheets in winter...and summer, Feeder of the Cats, Comedian, Launderer, and Noise Maker.

Mostly, though...you have been, and continue to be, the love of my life.

OMG!! Shoes!!

2009-11-01T10:07:00.002-05:00

OK, yeah...this is kinda true. Oh...FINE!!! YES it is true! I admit it. I love shoes. And yes...this is really how I shop for them. LOL

http://www.cracked.com/funny-2422-shoes/

and after reading the flowchart, I must have the ivory shoes at the top of the page. How adorable are they???

Shake Your Groove Thing...

2009-10-24T22:20:00.002-04:00

Omg. I am in full disco mode. I am stuck here in the Magic Chair, I don’t have a kitty on my lap and I just did 2 Nebulizer treatments back to back. One treatment is like a cup of coffee so now I am pretty buzzed and jittery. LOL. My hands are shaking too much for me to cross stitch so I figured I would spew on here until things calmed down a bit.

I am still sick. I don’t have Hamthrax any longer but I am dealing with one of the complications. Because I have asthma my lungs are taking a bit longer to come back from this. I am currently on Prednisone and I was on some pretty heavy duty antibiotics to try and avoid a bacterial infection but I got one anyway. So I have been out of work all week. Ugh. I should be able to get off the steroids by Thanksgiving. I know…really.

We got rain all day today so Michael is actively looking for the leak. He has been in the basement cutting into the walls. I know…really. On the plus side he is getting the mold out of the house. It seems like everything happened this week. We discovered not only the mold but the bees…er…I mean wasps as well.

So now, to recap…leak in the basement = removal of drywall. Ok, I can see that. There are holes in the walls down in the basement…the finished basement…the NICE finished basement. And the water is still trickling in since Michael hasn’t found the source of the leak yet.

Ok, lets ignore the basement and just head to the first floor. Things are fine here. Got a new computer for the desk in the kitchen (it was lonely) so I have been on that quite a bit lately. The kitchen is a mess though. I don’t have the energy to actually clean anything so Michael has been feeding me leftovers and we have been piling everything in the sink. The only problem I have with this process is that I can see the sink from the desk. I think I need to move the monitor juuuusssttt a little…yeah…that’s it. No more dirty dishes. Lol. Mum is coming over tomorrow to do some motherly fussing over me and she will probably do the dishes. I can live with that. I am sick of the first floor…heading up…

Ok, on the Bee floor. Lol. We had the Bee guy come out today in between storm cells. He found our problem and treated the nest. He is coming back Monday and Tuesday to follow up but he is confident that we are done with them. We were getting one or two in the master bathroom from the vent, but we were getting more in the guest bathroom. Today after he sprayed we actually had to close the door to the master bathroom because they just started falling out of the vent! Fortunately the vent is directly over the toilet so they just fell in. Easy clean up. We go in every couple of hours and just flush. Lol there were a couple that were still flying around in there so we just keep the door closed until they die too. I just wish there was a way to get rid of them without killing the poor things.

Lets see, the master shower still doesn’t work on this floor, we have bees in the bathrooms, and I need to paint my study and the guest bathroom. Sigh…this place is falling down around my ears. And the fact that it has all happened (with the exception of the master shower) in the past few weeks is really hysterical. I step back and try to look at it objectively and I just laugh. I think the only reason I don’t really freak out about anything is because other than the mold issue (which is now gone) and the bee issue (which is slowly dying in my toilet) there are no unsanitary or unhealthy issues. They are mostly cosmetic. Drywall is easy to fix after the leak is located. January the master bathroom is being fixed but really that is an inconvenience at this point…we are used to showering in the guest bathroom. After the leak is fixed the hardwood and the French doors are being replaced…again an inconvenience once the water is gone.

I am starting to wonder if I am becoming complacent…once upon a time my house was very important to me. While it is still very important, I am not as freaked about it as I used to be. I used to want it to be the envy of the neighborhood…now I will be happy when it doesn’t have holes in the walls. LOL!! And the holes in the walls don’t bother me that much because Michael can fix them in a day. I am more interested in living in my house than managing it or decorating it. Meh…it is just a matter of priorities.

Anyway, the buzz has worn off and now I can get back to doing some cross stitch. I seem to stitch and stitch and never finish anything…eh…gives me a goal to work towards…oh, and I am still in Disco Mode…since I have been writing I have listened to Donna Summer, Peaches and Herb, The Hues Corporation, the Bee Gees, and KC and the Sunshine Band…all courtesy of Pandora Disco Radio

…Rock on witcha bad self… shake your booty…She’s a Bad Mama Jama…

This is Starting to Suck

2009-10-19T23:29:00.003-04:00

Okay. I am getting to the point where I am starting to believe in The Anderson Luck again. And It isn't just me...it seems like everyone who comes to our place is affected by it. It is like we are living in The Grudge house. everyone who visits is instantly marked as a recipient of some good ole Anderson Luck. So far this year:

Bathroom still isn't fixed - it is going on 2 years. We originally paid 14K to have it done, to have it done RIGHT will take an additional 20K (I really hate general contractors)...good thing we have two other bathrooms in the house or I would really be bitching about it.

I got a kidney stone on my birthday. When I went to get it taken care of, I caught a virus that turned into an upper respiratory infection. I gave my virus to my mother, and it turned into pneumonia for her.

I was out of work for a week. I have only had this job since February and it is the BEST FREAKIN JOB I have ever had.

I dropped my Ipod and now the glass on the front is broken. I left the plastic cover on it and I think that is the only thing holding the glass in. It still works though so I am going to wait until the holidays so I have a reason to get another one. lol.

We have a leak in the basement now. It is coming in somewhere in the back. We thought it was one of the windows in the kitchen. Michael caulked everything...it still leaks. Now we have to call a handyman/contractor to come out and fix it.

The leak caused mold in the basement...now we have to call a mold company to come out and fix that.

The leak caused water damage to the hardwood floors in the small dining room...now we have to have the floor replaced.

Since we are having the floor replaced, we figured we will just go ahead and replace the back door with a couple of French Doors since I know that as soon as we pull up the floor in there we are going to find all kinds of damage to the door frame (which might actually be causing the leak in the basement).

As of today we have a bee infestation in the ONLY OTHER BATHROOM WITH A SHOWER!!! somewhere the bees are getting inside the bathroom. 2 days ago there were 3, yesterday there were 6 and today there were 9. Tomorrow I expect 12. They are getting in around the window somewhere. I think the top because that is the only place I cant see when I stand on the toilet. with my luck I am thinking that was a dangerous thing to do. I should have either fallen off the toilet and broke my nose, or I should have gotten stung and gone into anaphalactic shock. Luck must have been busy with a neighbor who visited once because it wasn't looking at me at that moment. Since I am sick, I just sighed and closed the bathroom door.

and now I have Hamthrax. and I am going to be out of work for another few days...and we are into the third quarter reporting time. and this is the time that we are required to work overtime to get the shit done. And my boss has pneumonia...and her daughter has the flu.

Please, I beg of you...do not come visit me...you might not survive. I think the only reason Michael and I do is because we are now conditioned to tolerate the Anderson Luck. The only reason we don't move everything out and strike a match is because the Insurance will probably figure out what happened.

Only Me...

2009-10-10T11:11:00.000-04:00

Okay, so it is official…Autumn is afraid of the dark. Yeah, I know she is a cat…and yeah I know cats are nocturnal. Look, it isn’t my doing, I just figured it out. Though I must say, since I gave her the night light things are much better.

The first night I had Autumn it was just her and I in my parents room. My parents like it really dark so once the lights are out it is very disorienting. Well, I had been reading and Autumn was laying up against me purring. Shortly after I turned out the light she started hissing and growling. I turned the light on to see what she was doing and she instantly started purring. I turned the light back off and the growling and hissing started again. We went through this about 4 times before I finally just gave up, turned the light on low and we both went to sleep.

Fast forward 3 years later and suddenly, in the middle of the night, Autumn starts attacking the other cats sleeping on the bed. Well, cats screaming, growling, and hissing all through the house is not a pleasant way to wake up. In fact, there is no pleasant way to wake up at 3 in the morning. This happens for about a week…every single night. We start taking notes and trying to figure this out. It seemed like when a cat jumped on the bed to sleep with us it would startle Autumn. She would then go into Fight or Flight Mode and she is definitely a Fight kitty. So whatever kitty startled her would get the crap beat out of it. As soon as the beating was over Autumn would stroll back into the room – tail up and purring. By this time Michael and I would be up trying to restore peace to the house and the lights would be on.

After about 4 straight nights of this I called the vet. She said to bring her in to have her vision and hearing checked. If those were fine, then we might want to look into kitty Prozac to get her through this episode. As soon as she started talking about medicating her I started thinking about Feliway. Feliway is herbal and is supposed to calm the cats. It works great. There are 2 ways to administer it: 1) as a spray around the area the pet spends most time in, or 2) as a plug in (like Glade). I immediately went to Petsmart and got both. I put 2 plug ins in the room and sprayed it around like it was Poverty Repellant. LOL. That night we went to bed and waited for the midnight screaming marathon around the house.

Around 3 in the morning the screaming and growling and hissing and spitting started up again. Again we got up and tried to restore peace in the house. Again Autumn comes strolling in purring and with her tail up. Michael commented on the immediate change in her and then I realized that she doesn’t beat the other cats during the day. In fact, during the day everyone is friendly and nice…it was only happening at night with all the lights out. Holy Shit! My cat was afraid of the dark. I immediately plugged in a digital clock that shines blue and all was fine. We haven’t had any screaming or midnight beatings since.

We also figured that it started last week because we finally put away the rolling air conditioner. I like to sleep in the cold and during the summer it costs a mint to do that. So Michael and I compromised and keep the house at 72 degrees day and night. But we also have a portable air conditioner that we run at night to get the bedroom down to 65 degrees. We close the door most of the way so the cats can still get in and out, and when we get up in the morning we turn off the portable AC. Why is the portable AC important? Because it has a bright blue power light that illuminates the room when it is on. Not too bright but enough that a kitty could see everything. With the blue clock plugged in it too illuminates the room enough for a kitty to see.

It has been a week now and there has been no getting up in the middle of the night to restore peace or rescue a kitty. The other kitties are starting to come back to the bedroom to sleep. So far Bumpers is the first, but when I woke up this morning Cheese was laying next to me and purring so hard he was squeaking. Things are getting back to normal…though with us we don’t know how long that is going to last.

An Intelligent Voice Amongst all the Noise

2009-09-28T14:05:00.011-04:00

OMG! I so do love this website:

http://scienceblogs.com/pharyngula/2009/09/advice_for_atheists.php

Before you go there, be warned, it requires rational thought and intelligence. Enjoy.

Love the commute...

2009-09-21T09:19:00.004-04:00

When you do something for a long time it tends to become mindless. It cant be helped, it just happens. I am talking specifically about my commute. There are some days – especially when I am tired - that I don’t remember driving to work, and yet there I am sitting in the parking lot getting ready to go into the building. I joke that my car knows the way to the office and that is how I get there. I have been doing this commute for almost 7 years and I still love it.

When I first started doing this commute, I was going to college. I was taking the back roads from my house to the college every day. This back way takes me through farm land on 2 lane roads. It isn’t uncommon to encounter a tractor or big hay truck along the way and people on these roads are generally unhurried and friendly. Since I loved going to college and was in a great mood this commute was literally a drive in the country for me.

Now that I am working, I am doing the commute through the farmlands on the back roads again. The job I do is incredibly suited to my strengths and likes. The people are friendly and nice. The company is strong and ethical. I have been here 6 months and while the honeymoon is definitely over I am still happier here than I have ever been anywhere else. I have a sense of accomplishment and productivity when I leave at night. And when I leave I get to drive home through some of the most beautiful roads in Maryland.

Because I have been doing this commute for a while I have a sense of ownership for it. I notice when the roads are getting worn, I notice when the house for sale needs its lawn cut, I notice when one of the houses along the way gets a new deck. I track the seasons by my commute as well – in spring the hay gets tall, gets cut, and gets baled, the calves and lambs show up and the corn fields get tilled. Summer brings the shoulder high corn, fall is like driving inside an intricate stained glass window, and winter brings the silvers and grays that seem bleak and never ending. I grieved for the house that lost a mature tree after a particularly fierce storm, and was relieved when someone bought and refurbished the old Victorian on the hill.

We are on this earth for such a short time that it seems silly to do something that makes you so unhappy. But at the same time I can see how the commute can seem like a necessary evil - Ya gotta work and ya gotta get there somehow. But maybe taking a back road will make a difference. It may increase your drive time by a couple of minutes but if it alleviates some road rage, or the sights make you appreciate your life a little more, isn't it worth the extra time?

Just stay off my back roads. I have my commute timed to the minute and the addition of your car to my commute will just piss me off. Just sayin...

Now I Want a Big Goofy Dog

2009-08-31T11:45:00.000-04:00

My gym is set up so that all but 10 of the cardio machines face a bank of television sets. There are about 50 cardio machines, in rows that face 8 huge television sets. The other 10 cardio machines are along the side and they each have a television set attached to their display panel.

Ok, so I was at the gym on the elliptical machine enjoying the endorphins. Since there are 8 tvs to choose from I tend to watch a bit of everything. Well, a show came on one of the TVs that I at first just dismissed - it was a long jump competition for dogs. Well, considering I am not a dog person, I never knew these existed. But I am totally an animal person so I got sucked into the show.

It is pretty simple. There is a dog, an owner, a handler, a favorite toy and a pool. The dog waits at the end of a long runway while the handler keeps him/her from starting early. The owner waits at the edge of the pool with the favorite toy. The handler lets go, the dog starts to run and the owner throws the favorite toy into the pool. The idea is to get the dog to leap as far into the pool as possible. Well, let me just say, “Holy Shit!”

First of all, these dogs are in excellent shape. They were well trained, well behaved, and there wasn’t an ounce of fat on them. They were mostly Labs, but there were a few shepherds and other dogs as well. They were mostly mid sized dogs but they all were in their prime. They all wanted that toy, and they all wanted it NOW!

Secondly, the camera would focus in on the dogs faces before they started to run and these dogs were focused. As a cat person, I tend to think of dogs as great, loyal, loving creatures, but not as smart as cats. Ummmm…wow, was I wrong. I know some of it was bred into them – labs are water dogs, retrievers want to retrieve – but there is still a bit of training and conditioning that went into this. To get a dog to jump into a strange pool of water in front of strange people in a strange place takes a bit of getting used to.

Finally, after the dogs had their toy and got out of the pool they were greeted by their owners. Without exception, the owners greeted their dogs with love and pride. They didn’t seem to be in it for the prize as much as they found it a fun thing to do with their dog – their pal. And the dogs were pleased that they had pleased their owner, and got some head scratches out of it.

Typically, when there is a show on TV about animals I tend to tense up. Most of the shows are about abuse and neglect, or some horrific event and it always upsets me. But yesterdays show was about a bunch of people and their goofy dogs and I thoroughly enjoyed it. I didn’t see who won since my time on the elliptical was up and I was tired, but when I left, the longest jump was 20 feet 7 inches.

Holy Shit.

Fickle?

2009-08-26T14:11:00.001-04:00

Well, now that things have settled down here I can get back to normal life again. And for me, normal life means hating the gym. So for the past 3 weeks I haven’t had to worry about hating the gym because I didn’t have to go.

It all started with a kidney stone. I certainly wasn’t going to work out with that thing knocking around inside me. That took about a week’s worth of doctor appointments to get rid of. No working out for a week. Yippee.

While I was taking care of the kidney stone problem I picked up a bug at a hospital center or doctors office. So then I completely lost my voice and had a bit of a cough. So no working out with that either. Yippee.

I was supposed to start working out again yesterday, but all hell broke loose over the weekend so I am not starting back again until later tonight. Here is the funny thing…when I couldn’t work out, I wanted to. Now that I can…I am looking for reasons not to.

What? Ummmm…fickle much?

But I am not looking too hard for reasons. With the way things have been lately, I am really looking forward to having some time just for me. 30 uninterrupted minutes on an elliptical, 15 in a sauna, and 15 in a steam room; that sounds like heaven to me. And if I could go right now, it would happen. The problem is that it won’t happen until I commute to get home, have supper, and sit down. Then I hate the gym again because by now I am tired.

So, yea…I guess I am fickle after all.

Reflection

2009-08-20T13:21:00.002-04:00

I’m feeling a little reflective today…not like sunshine reflective – though I am so pale that when I am in the sun you have to use that little eclipse box you made in grade school. You know…looking directly at me will burn your retinas kind of reflective.

But that isn’t the point. The point is that lately I have been doing more thinking than doing. Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that I have been home more often because of the kidney infection and now the upper respiratory infection (that I got from going to the dr for the kidney infection). I think it has more to do with the fact that I quit watching TV.

We cancelled our Direct TV because there is no way we can moderate our TV watching. I would sit in front of it to eat lunch or supper and then an hour later I would still be there looking for something else to watch. Plus I had so many shows saved that in order to clear out the queue I would have to spend all weekend watching stuff. I finally decided I didn’t like the shows that much. I decided that if I really wanted to see a show I would have to go to the gym to see it. And a gym membership is cheaper each month than satellite TV so it just made sense.

A benefit to not having TV is that we were able to get rid of the big TV in the front room. It was HUGE!!! Before we got rid of the tv it always looked too crowded in the living room. We had the couch, 2 recliners, end tables, a big kitty condo, a coffee table and a sideboard. We moved the tv and stand out, re-arranged the furniture, and moved the kitty condo and the sideboard to the small dining room. It is so big in there now it echoes. LOL. I also cleaned out the little hallway and window seat that connects the small dining room with the living room so that helped too. This weekend I am tackling the formal dining room and the sewing room in addition to just puttering around.

While I am doing all this moving, cleaning and straightening I am also getting rid of a lot of stuff - stuff that should have gone to Goodwill or Salvation Army a long time ago. It needs to just leave my house now. I don’t need it, I don’t use it, and it’s gotta go. That is, everything with the exception of the various collections I have. The teacups, fine china and crystal stay. As do my grandmothers glass and porcelain items. Anything that has personal value…oh, and I have to keep that little wreath that I got from a friend of a friend of a friend…lol. Ok, now I know why my house is full.

BUT…doing all of this gives me lots of time to think (see I came back to the original thought). I normally get this way during spring and fall when I do most of my gardening. It is relaxing and my hands know what to do so it allows my mind to wander. Plus it is a beginning and an end as far as seasons go and that makes me reflective as well. But for the past few weekends I have been doing all this organizing and cleaning and straightening and because of that, a lot of thinking.

At the end of the weekends I sit in my room (used to be the guest bedroom) with the kitties and think about the week ahead. I plan out the lunches, the outfits, the gym time, and the general schedule. And it is at this time that I start feeling the most content.

I think it has a lot to do with the feeling that, finally, I am in control of my life. I know I’m not, but I do have control over the little things. I think most of it is because my job and commute are reasonable now. Sure we have our busy times, but my job allows for a life. And because I have the time now to take care of things I don’t feel so frazzled or out of control.

So, in addition to my commute, my bosses, and my actual job, that is another benefit of working at a good company – time to think. And when my brain quits hurting from all the thinking, I may write again.

New Favorite Website!

2009-08-09T11:38:00.003-04:00

OMG I just found my new favorite website!

Go here (Warning – offensive language and sexual and drug references): http://www.textsfromlastnight.com/recent/

The site is called Texts From Last Night and people send in the texts they have either sent or received. Until you are able to get there, here are some samplings…enjoy.

(865): Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.

(209): do you want me to make hamburgers?
(541): i'm vegan
(209): i'll put lettuce on them

(414): You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"

970): Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.

(828): There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
(402): Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
(402): The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"

(331): You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.

(905): Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
(1-905): With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.

(215): I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
(267): I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.

(416): I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
(1-416): u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u

(858): I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.

(303): these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
(303): now he is talking to a potato

(702): Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
(1-702): You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.

(925): My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
(510): wats the point then?

Day 2-8

2009-06-08T14:20:00.001-04:00

Well, I didn’t get the opportunity to write as much as I had planned. I thought I would be a passenger in the RV, writing as we drove…using the scenery as inspiration. The reality was that I drove the pick up truck that was towing the ATVs and taking photos while I was driving. Each night after supper we would go back to the hotel room where I thought about blogging and then went to bed. LOL. so here is the synopsis of the trip.

Day 2:
Drove a lot, checked into hotel, went to bed

Day 3
Drove a lot, checked into hotel, went to bed

Day 4
Drove a lot, checked into hotel, went to bed

Day 5
Drove a lot, checked into hotel, went to bed

Day 6
Drove a lot, checked into hotel, went to bed

Day 7
Drove a lot, checked into hotel, went to bed

Day 8
Drove a lot, got home, went to bed

Day 1 - Saturday

2009-05-25T23:29:00.004-04:00

We left MD an hour later than was scheduled. It was okay though, we had already resigned ourselves to a long day. And because we were flying SouthWest we had also resigned ourselves to getting to know each other very very well. Michael and I were fortunate enough to get a couple of seats together so it wasn’t all that bad, but it was still a long flight…I was really hoping I didn’t get a Deep Vein Thrombosis.

We pulled into San Diego Airport at 10:30 California time (1:30 our time) and we were all so excited to see each other that we didn’t get to lay our head down on the air mattress until midnight CA time. At 8 the next morning my eyes popped open and I was ready to get going. The Girls went to breakfast and by the time we got back the guys had already picked up the U-haul and the trailers. With the help of 6 burly guys the entire apartment was loaded into the truck in 2 hours.

We went out to an early supper and then hit the road. We didn’t get too far, only to El Centro - which is 2 hours east of San Diego - but it was enough to make us feel like we were on our way. Now I am sitting in a nice quiet hotel room, Michael has Sports Center (duh nuh nuh – duh nuh nuh) on the tv and the air conditioner is cranked.

I am pretty beat so I am just going to upload some pix and call it a day.

My Aunt Jackie flew out with us to surprise my parents.

The Apartment before we loaded everything into the U Haul

San Diego has a cool looking Mass Transit system.

The RV

Everyone relaxing in the RV before we took off.

My Mum and my Aunt Jackie.

That stripe on the mountain is a road carved out of it.

Layers of Mountains.

The UHaul towing my Mum's car.

Thats it for now. I will write next time about Roswell NM...it was like coming home. LOL

Class and Sophistocation

2009-05-20T10:10:00.001-04:00

Ya know...

For as refined and sophisticated as I like to believe I am, the reality is…I am just one toilet in the hall away from being a Redneck.

De-stressed

2009-05-14T16:31:00.001-04:00

Went to a Mexican restaurant last night with some friends. Got drunk and some how my shoes ended up on the table. I recall talking about the slippery soles but then being, once again, struck by just how darn cute the shoes are. LOL.

Apparently, when I drink the filter between my brain and mouth shuts down. And apparently I am Spanish when I am drunk. LOL. Though I am proud to say that the wait staff and the owners all understood what I was saying so that makes me happy. But, I think a couple times I got Spanish and Italian mixed up. Either way, they understood. LOL. While I was conversing in Spanish with the waiter my friends were like, “Who the hell is that?” They were asking Michael if he knew I could speak another language. He mentioned that as soon as this semester is over for him he is going to start learning Spanish so he can keep up with me.

HMMMMMmmmmm…maybe if I start ballroom dancing he will learn so he can keep up with me. Ha Ha.

The New House

2009-04-21T11:42:00.001-04:00

The last couple of weeks have been pretty busy. We are in the process of buying a rental property so there are tons of things to do with that: papers to sign, inspections to do, more papers to sign, wait, more papers to sign, wait some more, write a huge check for one tiny key. We have a closing date of May 8 so it will all be finished soon.

Actually, things have calmed down considerably now that the inspection is over. We haven’t really had to do anything with the house for about a week. As soon as the appraiser was finished everything else was done except for the waiting. We even have a renter. It is an older couple and I think they will be renting for a while so they seem like a safe bet. The couple will be moving into the house around the first of June so the house will only sit empty for about 3 weeks. Yippee!

Michael’s mum was just out here looking for houses about an hour away from us. It would be nice to have her here. That way we can visit more often and she can come see us, but at the same time we are still far enough away that we have to make plans to see each other. She left this morning to go back to Missouri after staying for about 3 days. I think she may be out here by the end of the summer. With everything going on, the holidays are going to be great this year.

Office Narnia

2009-03-31T10:36:00.002-04:00

My building is a great big rectangle. It is about 10 stories tall, and the footprint is a rectangle. In the center of this rectangle is the elevator shaft that houses 3 elevators. On my floor of the building everything is set up on the perimeter of the building in order to take advantage of the windows. It is a huge space and quite honestly, I don’t know anyone on the other end of my floor because I never venture over there. We have 2 lunchrooms and over a hundred work spaces on my floor alone. And in the center is the elevator shaft.

Why am I focused on the elevator shaft? Well, the other day I found this whole secret set of tunnels that meander through the elevator shaft area. I know…'huh? It is an elevator shaft…it goes 2 directions – up and very-fast down.’ Well there is an area that goes around the elevator shaft that is kinda closed off. And if you go through the door on the west side of the building you can quickly go through the center of the building to the east side…or the north side…or the south side. It is like a little hallway that encircles the elevator shaft. There are doors that open to the mechanics of the elevator on one side of the hallway, and the other side of the hallway has doors that open to various other places of office space. Now, instead of walking all the way around the perimeter of the building to get to one of the lunchrooms, I can just go through the center.

I keep expecting to find a counter culture of people in the elevator shaft hallways. I mean, we already get deliveries through there, and if any office furniture has to be moved it typically goes through there so as not to disturb the people working on the floor. Also, the recycling is stored there until the shredder people come to pick it up. But I fully expect to go through the hallway one day, open the door to what used to be the lunchroom and completely end up in Office Narnia. Or to open the door to the hallway and encounter a group of Hobos sitting around a campfire cooking beans over it in a can.

Odd or Even?

2009-03-13T16:41:00.001-04:00

I cant remember if the odd years are the good ones or the even ones. You know how it seems like we get alternating good years? I just cant remember which are mine, the odd or the even.

If I try to work it out, then this is what I come up with:

Last Year:
Good:
Got Barry out of my house
Went to Vegas
Went to Boston
Went to Rhode Island
Went to the Midwest
Went on cruise
Got a job
Fostered and placed 5 kittens over the summer

Bad:
Blew out my knee
Found out job was shit
My sister became even more of a rotten bitch than she already was and proceeded to make everyone around her unhappy.
Lost about 20% of portfolio

This year:
Good:
Got laid off from shitty job.
Got an incredible job after being unemployed for 2 weeks
Said incredible job came with a pay raise and a whole bunch of professionalism
Severed a toxic friendship
Started going back to the gym (YAY)
Contracted work to be done to the house starting next week (check with me in a week to see if this is still a good thing)

Bad:
Had a fender bender on Friday the 13th (honest)

Huh. Well, if I had to guess which year my good ones are I don’t think I can decide. It is still early in the year so things could go down hill pretty quick and overall last year felt pretty good. I guess if my bad years feel pretty good, then I am not even going to complain.

Well, I still will, just not too loudly.

2009-03-13T12:15:00.002-04:00

Well, the reason I haven’t been writing is because my coffee pot (and accessories) came in last Wednesday. Since then I have been shaking too much from caffeine overload to get my hands to do anything constructive. Is it wrong to love a machine? is it wrong to love it more than anyone I know? I swear, between my Ipod touch and my new coffee pot, I am the happiest person around.

Even the hubby loves the coffee pot. I ordered a pack of assorted teas and a pack of hot chocolate so he can use it too. And this is going to be great in the summertime for iced tea and coffee. All I have to do is make the tea/coffee extra strong and dump it into a glass of ice and I have fresh iced tea/coffee. yum!

We are getting ready to have the shower redone. We are planning on doing the demo ourselves and when that is done, having a contractor come in and put it all back together. I will be so happy to use the master bathroom again. The guest bathroom is nice and everything, but the master bathroom is huge and we are not using it because our new shower, that was supposed to operational a year ago, leaks! Since it is just the hubby and I in the house it has been no big deal, we suffer through – lol. The only good thing is that I get to go tile shopping again.

Next week the roofing guys are going to rip my house apart. The house has the original roof so it is time. Michael saw some shingles sticking up and checked things out. He had an idea that we were going to need it replaced, and the roofing guy confirmed it (of course he did). But he has his own contracting business and his company has done work for us before so we trust him. He says it can be done in one day and we don’t even need to be there. Yay!

After that the shower is getting finished, we are putting French doors on the back that open to the sunroom, adding a big deck, and replacing the front porch (I hate what we have, I want a different design and material). For both the porch and the back deck we are going to use the Trex material so we don’t have to do anything else to it. The less work the better.

After that is just little stuff – we are moving the laundry room from the basement to the smallest bedroom upstairs. That still leaves us 3 bedrooms up there and we have the extra guest room in the basement so that is fine…but it will be nice to have the laundry upstairs. We are expanding the pantry area and expanding Michael’s workroom. Then summer will be here. Lol. I just wish we could go away for 2 weeks on vacation and when we get back it would be all finished. I am not looking forward to having all that work going on while we are living there…I know…bitch and moan. Lol.

Sigh...Still no Pot

2009-03-03T10:07:00.001-05:00

Well, poop. I didn’t get my coffee pot yesterday. I was really hoping that it would come over the weekend but no luck. Then yesterday we got about 6 inches of snow and everything shut down in order to avoid the WHITE DEATH FROM ABOVE. So now I will be waiting another day for it. And it would have been perfect for yesterday since I was home all day anyway.

I knew it was going to snow and I knew we were going to get a couple of inches, but when I got up that morning everything was covered and the hubby was already out there shoveling. While I was in the shower I decided I didn’t feel like braving the elements and the traffic and decided that I was going to take a snow day. After my shower I changed into fresh pajamas and went and let Michael know he could take the Trooper if he wanted. He ended up taking the escort anyway. An hour after he got to the office the owner came in and said that the office was closed for the day. LOL. Well Michael was already there! He got back home around 10 and did homework for the rest of the day.

I mostly cross stitched, listened to a book on CD and snuggled the poodins in the Magic Chair next to the window. There were brief episodes of getting up and walking around, but most of the day was spent under a cozy blanket with a couple of kitties. That coffee pot would have come in handy yesterday.

When I was forced to dig my way out of the kitties, blankets and overstuffed furniture I puttered. It was really a great day. I had all the blinds/curtains open and had the big front door open as well. I love the quality of light that we get when it snows. It wasn’t overcast and the light was bright…it was just snowing out. The house was already pretty clean, I just did a few dishes, straightened up the living room and organized stuff. I am always amazed at how much bigger the house looks when everything is where it belongs. The only thing that would have made it better would have been if I got that coffee pot yesterday.

Livin' Like a Rock Star

2009-02-26T15:18:00.003-05:00

WooHoo!!

I have been living large the past week. I vacillate between being super cheap and being stupid with my money. Lol. It all started a week ago Wednesday. I was working at home and getting frustrated with my computer screen. I have a hard time working on spreadsheets at home because our desk is so big. LOL. I know…I am getting there. The desk isn’t just big, it is monstrous. In fact, our computer guy came out to the house and when he got to the study he stopped in his tracks and said that it was the biggest desk he has ever seen. Lol. The computer only takes up a quarter of the desk, and I keep the monitor pushed back near the wall because…well, because that doesn’t leave unusable space behind it. But with the monitor pushed all the way back I cant easily see the spreadsheets I am working on. If I expand the view to the size I need, then I cant get the whole spreadsheet on the screen. Therefore, I needed a new monitor. I went online and got this baby.

We got the e-mail saying that we would be receiving the monitor the week of March 1st. We got it the following Saturday. Let me just say….OH MY GOODNESS!! It is incredible. It took us all of 5 minutes to get used to the widescreen but I can zip through my work at home now.

The next day I went shopping and picked up 8 pairs of shoes. Well, to be fair, some of them were on sale and I needed another pair of black heels for work.

Then I ordered my new coffee pot (the B70). I had been waiting to see if the feeling of ‘oh my goodness…I MUST have that’ would pass. After waiting a month, I still needed (yes NEEDED) that coffee pot so I decided to go ahead and get one…after I saved up enough – by not going to lunch, not getting Duncan Donuts coffee, etc – to pay for it. The problem with this is that I don’t bring lunch to the office so I tend to go out all the time. I brought my lunch for almost a week and was pretty tired of the extra work involved either in the morning or the night before so I quit. After 4 more weeks of dreaming of my coffee pot, I was able to get it.

I am pretty cheap about some things. Like, I already have a perfectly fine coffee pot so I don’t need to spend the money on a new one just because it looks like a spaceship replicator. What decided me was that it is all pretty self contained. Fill the reservoir, pop the little cup in, put your mug under the spout and push the button. No more messing with filters, grounds, water, etc. After the cup is brewed the little coffee pod pops out and you just toss it. No pot to wash, no leftover coffee to burn on the bottom of the forgotten pot. And if you want another cup, you don’t have to brew another pot! I ordered it yesterday so it should get here in 5 to 7 days. I am hoping it arrives by Saturday like the monitor did. Lol.

I finally decided that I needed a Mani/Pedi to recuperate from all the stress and work of shopping like a fiend so I had that last night after work.

But before you think I am being a typical woman and spending all my husbands’ money, he has been doing a little spending of his own. In fact when I got home from my nail/feet appt, he made me sit in the recliner and he proceeded to show me what he got. Surprise, surprise, he went clothes shopping! Now that he was working in an office he felt he needed some winter professional clothes. In the summer he can wear polo shirts with his slacks, but he only had a few sweaters. Not anymore. LOL.

At this point we are seriously considering turning one of our upstairs bedrooms into a big closet. But that would involve spending more money.

Downsizing - Not Your Average Response

2009-02-25T13:18:00.005-05:00

Wow, I cant believe how I lucked out!

About a month ago I was downsized from my job at a small, financially struggling company. I hated that job, but I don’t give up easily so I stuck it out. I stuck it out even after I realized that the Controller had something personal against me, even after his actions proved to be chauvinistic, even after the entire office knew that he had something personal against me, and even after he called me an ‘airhead’. I dont quit unless it is a lost cause (though I was planning on looking for another position after I had been there for 6 months).

The layoff wasn’t surprising. They were talking about their cashflow problems all the time. My friend in Collections was getting huge amounts of pressure to have people pay their debts because the company was having problems paying the bills. They pretty much got rid of the people they didn’t like. There was me, a girl who was actually using her health insurance because she had breast cancer, a girl who had been there for 6 years but was suddenly ‘making mistakes’ and the receptionist who played solitaire all day.

When the first person got the pink slip that Thursday, I was surprised. She had been with the company for a very long time. Then, my dick of a boss said he needed to see me at 1 that day for a meeting. Well, this was at 11 and I didn’t want to wait. I was already looking forward to a nice long weekend, and I wanted to get it started. But, on the off chance that it was just a meeting and not a layoff, I didn’t start packing my stuff. I did, however, call my friend at Accountants Inc. and told her what was going on. She was shocked but believing. She told me to give her a call and let her know what was going on and she would start looking for another job for me right away.

At 1 I went into the snake pit that was the Controllers office and he had HR on the phone. I was getting shit-canned and couldn’t have been happier. I know the jerk was surprised to see a look of pure happiness come over my face. They said it was downsizing so that meant I could apply for unemployment, and according to my contract, I would also get a severance package. I was so happy! Being downsized looks much better on a resume than ‘the boss was a jerk so I quit’. LOL. And my friend at Accountants Inc was already setting up interviews for me.

In all, I was out of work a whole 2 weeks. So I got my last paycheck and my severance package and then went back to work. There was no lapse in pay and I didn’t even get to apply for unemployment!

What is best though is where I ended up. My job is awesome. I have only been here 3 weeks, and I still have moments of ‘Holy shit! I LOVE this job’. By this time at my last company I was wondering if I had made a huge mistake.

Things are really good. So good in fact that I feel like if I keep talking about how good they are I will screw it up! I will stop talking about it after I say this last little bit.

Reasons for the Job Awesomeness:

I am actually doing accounting work – Balance sheets, income statements, taxes.

I work 37.5 hours a week at the office. I get there at 8:30 and leave at 5 with an hour lunch. Right now we are in our busy season and I bring a file home every night, but I log how long it took me to do the file, and that info will be used for the next year when they hire the temps for the busy season. It takes me about an hour to do a file. I tend to do it when I am waiting for supper to be ready, or at night, on the bed while Michael is watching golf. Lol.

I completely do not have to deal with traffic. I take the back roads all the way to my house. It takes me about 30 minutes and is a really pretty drive. I used to have to deal with traffic AND it would take me 30 minutes.

Big raise – Yippee

10% Bonus – also Yippee

14 Personal days up front and 2 weeks accrued vacation a year to start – Mega Yippee. And I don’t have to beg and plead to use any of it. They don’t care if I am not here as long as my work doesn’t suffer.

Incredible benefits.

Very private workspace. The only way you pass my doorway is if you come to see me by mistake. I am completely out of the way.

Really, really nice boss. She is smart, funny, and incredibly competent.

Incredible director. She is a work hard/play hard kind of person. When it is busy she expects you to work as hard as she does. When it isn’t busy, she doesn’t care what happens as long as the work gets done.

Incredible learning and promotional opportunities.

Ok, I have raved about my job enough for one day…I don’t want to jinx it…But…Holy Shit! I LOVE my job.

Cruise - Conclusion

2009-02-24T16:02:00.000-05:00

The last day of our trip was just travel. We hopped on a plane in Miami, had a layover in Atlanta, and got to Baltimore around 6. For the most part it was fine. Jackie and I were so sunburned that we were miserable, but there was nothing to be done about it other than slather on more lotion. We had a full plane for the first leg of the trip. The woman sitting next to me said she could feel the heat baking off me. Lol. I had opted for wearing an island dress so there was minimal fabric to touch me. I wore that and underwear and that was it. I was too miserable to care. Fortunately, the dress was sleeveless and full length. Lucky for me it was a size too big as well. I got it because it was the only one left in that color, and since my mom is a seamstress she was going to take it in when we got back home. I was so happy to have that Muumuu. Lol.

When Michael picked us up at the airport he couldn’t load the luggage in the car until he was no longer doubled over with laughter at our discomfort. He was very caring and sweet once he got it out of his system. Once home, I stepped into the nice cool shower, slathered on rich lotion and slipped between the cool sheets of my own bed. I had my hubby, my kitties, and my stuff. Things were good.

Shortly after we got back I got my job at GoIndustry-DoveBid and said good bye to any kind of social life or time off. Good thing I had memories of the cruise, because things were going to get shitty in a hurry.

Cruise final day

2009-02-20T16:35:00.000-05:00

The final day of the cruise was spent at the private island owned by Norweigan Cruise Lines. All things considered, that was the best day.

We slept until we just woke up, no planned time for the alarm. After a nice leisurely breakfast we went and changed into our beach wear and headed down to the boat that was there to take us to the island.

This ship actually went all the way up to the beach, dropped a gangplank and we walked off the boat into the warm powdery sand. We immediately staked out a few lounge chairs and started exploring the island. There were rope hammocks strung between every tree and the bar, the band, and the buffet was conveniently placed in the center of everything. Mum signed up for parasailing and I rented the biggest raft I have ever seen! It was definitely big enough for the three of us! After checking everything out, we headed back to the lounge chairs.

Jackie dragged her lounge chair into the water and proceeded to become a noodle and mum and I hopped onto the ginormous raft. It was heaven. The water was splashing up on us and we were floating around just soaking up the sun. After a while we decided we were hungry and we scooped Jackie out of the water and we went to check out the buffet. Not bad – beach fare really. There were burgers, dogs, chicken, salads, rice…wait, what? I know, rice at the beach. But it was good.

We sat and ate. I swear food tastes better when it is eaten outside! It was very warm. My sarong was sticking to me and there was sand everywhere. I had it in my hair, between my toes, on the backs of my arms. But I didn’t really care. By the time we were ready to go back to the raft I had already downed a Miami Vice and was working on my second one. I took it back with me and drank it while sitting on the raft in the middle of the Caribbean sea. After a while of drifting I started to feel less than well. It was probably the combination of the food, the alcohol and the water. I dragged the raft back to the shore and put one length of rope around the lounge chair that Jackie was using and just laid on the raft in the shallow water.

After Mum got back from parasailing, we noticed the island was starting to empty out. I grabbed a hammock and immediately realized I was going to need a towel to lay on. Between the scratchy-ness of the rope and my poor sunburned skin, it was not comfortable. Fast forward 10 minutes and I am napping in the hammock with a couple of towels under me and another drink in my hand (for the sunburn pain, honest). I was laying there thinking that nothing could be better and it was then that Mother Nature decided to prove me wrong…it started to rain. Just barely more than a sprinkle, very gentle and very warm. This was heaven. I was still in my swimsuit and the rain felt wonderful on my poor skin! I didn’t even care that I was tempting cancer by being in the sun…it was absolutely glorious to bask and relax. It has been almost 6 months since the cruise and I can still remember that feeling of bliss. Of just doing what I wanted when I wanted to do it, no responsibilities, no worries...sigh.

I think I need another cruise.

Cruise Day 2 Conclusion

2009-01-28T12:03:00.002-05:00

I think the best part of the cruise to this point wasn’t even on the ship. The sting ray excursion was so incredible that the rest of the entire cruise pales in comparison. We chose the sting rays over the dolphin swim simply because it offered more time with the rays. We were in the water with the rays for about 3 hours. It was on a private island, the rays seemed to be treated well, and the guides were quite knowledgeable about the rays.

Feeding the rays was incredible. It wasn’t as squishy as I had expected and it was really funny. We lined up in 2 rows across from each other. One line was parallel to the shore and the other line was parallel to the first line. The guide then went through the line with a couple of coolers and handed out frozen little squids. The rays knew exactly what to do. They swam in between the lines and grabbed the food.

Rays have their mouth and eyes on the underside of their body. To eat, they just vacuum up the food. So the rays were swimming up and down the line sucking up the food as they went past. Sometimes they would get confused and end up behind us and try to vacuum our legs or feet. There were rays flapping all over the place as they tried to get all the food. It was really a feeding frenzy and we were in the middle of it. Add that excitement to the fact that there were about 3 teenage girls in the group and it was a screaming good time! Sorry, had to say it. Then the guide singled out a huge ray and we all got pictures holding it. I am still looking for my pix. It was pretty cool since they got the pix while the ray was in mid flap.

The last hour of the excursion we spent on the other side of the island. There were lounge chairs lined up on the beach and the bar was there. We all pulled the lounge chairs into the water far enough where we were laying in the water but it wasn’t lapping over us constantly. Though there was a rogue wave or two…in fact, the only complaint I had about it was that a wave came up and splashed salt water into my fruity, girly drink. I drank it any way, it wasn’t that much salt water and the damn thing cost $7!!

I could tell I was getting a bit pink. I had been applying sunblock all day, but I was also in the water and the life vest was rubbing on my shoulders. Laying there in the water I draped my t-shirt over my head so my face would be protected and just basked. I had forgotten how good it felt to just lay in the sun.

I wore my sarong over my swimsuit back to the ship and after my shower I put on a sundress so there wouldnt be too many clothes rubbing on my increasingly sensitive skin. After a quick look in the mirror (no stroke today!)I knew that I was going to be uncomfortable later on…it was 1 in the afternoon and I was already sunburned, and it was only going to be worse as the day wore on. That in mind, we stayed in the air conditioned ship and just wandered around. They didn’t serve alcohol since they were in port, so I grabbed ice coffees from the bars we passed.

The ship was nice and empty during this time since everyone was either in port or on a shore excursion. We found the library and puttered around on the lower decks for a while. It was pretty relaxing to just wander around the nearly empty ship and explore.

By this time all of the sun and lack of sleep had caught up with me. We had supper at the italian restaurant and I was dead to the world by 10. No partying for me that night!

The Steve Irwin Shore Excursion

2009-01-28T11:27:00.000-05:00

For the shore excursion the next day a group of about 20 people went to a little island about 20 minutes from the cruise ship. We picked up our snorkels and life vests (I fought that one since I am a great swimmer but they insisted). We had our little training course and got some info on sting rays and then were allowed in the water.

The water was incredible. I have heard people say you can see right down to the bottom and that the water was so blue and warm but I never really paid much attention. I grew up near a beach and know first hand how filthy that water is. This was different. The water was the most beautiful turquoise I had ever seen. It was clear and clean and the perfect temp. Just cool enough to be relief from the sun without being cold and numbing. I could have stayed there all day.

I was interested in seeing how they were able to offer this shore excursion. I was thinking it would be a sting ray in a pen and we would each get our turn and a pix with it. Boy was I wrong! It was incredible! On one side of the pier they has a huge area penned off. It was pretty square, but it was HUGE. The pier made up one boundary, the shore made up another. The boundary to the ocean was way past the pier and too far out to swim to. The last boundary was down the beach too far to see.

Plus the sting rays were happy to see us…well, excited at least. They have learned that people in the water means food…and not in the Steve Irwin way either. Part of the excursion was feeding the sting rays (I will get to that) so the sting rays knew that they were getting fed soon. There were about 20 people on the trip and there were about 50 rays in all sizes. They were unhindered in any way (other than the boundaries) and were swimming freely. I was having the best time and was very happy for the life vest. LOL.

The life vest was canvas and only had the tiniest amount of air in it. Just enough to allow you to float without having to think about it and it certainly was not big and bulky. Combined with the snorkeling gear, it was perfect. I was floating around looking at all the fish and just basking in the sun and water and I realized I was getting a bit too relaxed. I was starting to fall asleep!!! I was all floaty and warm and comfy, doing the Dead Mans Float and I was really starting to drift off when the air horn blasted. Good thing too. I can just see myself falling asleep, snorting and inhaling a gallon of seawater into my lungs.

The air horn was to let us know it was time to feed the stingrays. I was looking forward to this part and I wasn’t. I wasn’t looking forward to it simply because it meant that I probably had to hold something squishy. I was kinda right. They passed around frozen little squids. Ick…but they were frozen so the squishy was taken out of the equation until you put it in the warm Caribbean water. After feeding the sting rays they all left (presumably to go take a nap after a large meal) and everyone else went to the other side of the pier. That is where all the lounge chairs were lined up and where the bar was.

Mum and I got fruity drinks with little umbrellas, dragged the lounge chairs into the water and basked in the hot sun and cool water until it was time to go back to the ship.

The Stroke

2009-01-24T14:40:00.001-05:00

I got to the ships doctor's office and found out that clinic hours are 8am to 11am and then again from 4pm to 6pm. It was 1 in the afternoon so I was right in the middle. The receptionist said I could be seen immediately but it would be $122. I asked how much it would cost if I waited until 4 to have my stroke and she said it would be $75. Well, it was only $50 more so I pulled out my health insurance card and slid it across the desk. The receptionist slid it back and said that they don’t accept insurance. Well, now I had a dilemma. I am notoriously cheap so I was weighing the 120 dollars if it turned out to be nothing or hoping the stroke would hit between 4 and 6 pm. I opted for scheduling the stroke for a more convenient time since my odd eyeball was the only symptom.

Back in the room my mum started grilling me: do you have a headache, is your vision blurry, are you seeing spots, are your ears ringing, can I have your grandfather clock when you die? Then she asked me something that I had completely forgotten about…What side of your head is your seasick patch on? I just looked at her dumbfounded and pulled the seasick patch off from behind my right ear. Could it really be that simple?

Turns out it was…we went to supper and then to a couple of shows. By the time we were dressed and ready to go to Carnival my eye was back to normal…so I started drinking. Lol.

Carnival was kind of a let down…it was supposed to be held on the pool deck but it was raining so they moved it all down to the Disco. Still, not too bad because they had drinks there too! And really, the more I drank, the better Carnival was. Booze Goggles…what cant they do?

Around 2 we went back to the room to get some sleep. The shore excursion for the next day was at 8 and I was really looking forward to it…swimming with the sting rays. Steve Irwin, here I come.

The Cruise - Day 2

2009-01-24T14:14:00.001-05:00

Ok, so the next morning, we get up and hit the buffet for breakfast (coffee). We had planned to go into the town of Freeport even though our shore excursion had been cancelled so we were grabbing a quick breakfast and we were off. We got ready and left the ship. 2 steps onto the gangplank and the heat hit me like a truck (or what I think being hit by a truck would feel like. Didnt like it, I dont think I am going to do the hit by a truck thing to find out if I was close). I actually stopped for a second in order to acclimate myself to the humidity and 100 degree heat. I was wearing a t-shirt and some denim shorts thinking that would be fine but suddenly I wanted nothing more than to get rid of the clothes. Unfortunately, the rest of the world wanted nothing more than for me to keep my clothes on! My mom was having the same problem and before we got off the gangplank we were both sweating.

A quick walk across the pier brought us to the taxi stand and some small booths that were selling Bahama crap: reed fans, shell necklaces, etc. What they were also selling were dresses - Very pretty, very colorful, very light and flow-y dresses. I found one I liked, paid for it and immediately pulled it over my head. It was a strapless so I was able to ditch the t-shirt, the bra, and the shorts since the dress was below the knee. Yeah, and I did this in the middle of the booth area. I was not waiting a second longer to ditch the clothes. I put what I was wearing in the bag that the dress originally came in and we were off to do more shopping.

Before we hit the Taxi stand I had picked up 3 more dresses and a sarong for the next day. We waited for the cab and before a minute had gone by, one pulled up. It was a mini van and my first thought was “Great. I wont have to sit too close to anyone. 3 in a minivan is plenty”. Well, we chatted with the driver and it turns out they were going to cram 10 of us in the van to take us to Freeport...at $5 each. Oh, and we shouldn’t worry, there were 2 more seats that folded down so they could get even more people in the minivan. At this point, Mum and I declined citing health and safety issues (it was unhealthy and unsafe for anyone to be that close to us when we are hot, sweaty and bitchy), but Jackie climbed right in. Mum and I headed back to the ship. By the time we got halfway there gravity had increased 20 fold and our dresses were soaked. We got up the gangplank and stepped through the hatch and were instantly enveloped by air so cold and refreshing that for a minute I forgot how to breathe. Ahhhhh…heaven.

Back in the room we each took showers and planned to lie down for a while and recover from the heat. As I was standing in front of the mirror combing my fingers through my mop of hair I stopped dead in my tracks. WTH??? I went to the mirror in the room thinking that the light was funny in the bathroom. Nope, it was the same here…my right pupil was dilated so much that you could barely see my iris. The other eye was fine - pupil small, iris big and green. I asked my mom if she could understand what I was saying and had her look at my pupils. She said she could understand me just fine and it was no big deal that one pupil was huge and the other wasn’t.

NO BIG DEAL? I was probably having a stroke…or maybe the intense heat gave me a brain tumor…maybe I was having an aneurysm...or maybe the heat had just boiled my brain…did I mention the stroke? I decided to go with the stroke option since that was quicker and headed down to the ships doctor.

Note

2009-01-24T12:08:00.000-05:00

Well, by now, anyone who knows me knows that I am the daughter in this scenario. I am tired of this line of blogging but again, if you know me you know I cant move on to something else unless I finish what I have started. So I am going to finish the cruise line of blogging in first person because it is just quicker and easier.

The Cruise - Day 1 (Cont.)

2008-10-04T10:47:00.000-04:00

Well the departure was a big letdown. There was no departure party like there always was on the Love Boat and the women were still in Miami so it was still 4 bazillion degrees. They were all tired from a full day of travelling and the daughter just wanted to sit for a while. They went to the pool deck to check out the party and as soon as they got off the elevator there was a staff member with a tray of Bahama Mamas. WooHoo. The daughter took 2 and then had to put them back on the tray so she could sign the slip adding them to her room charges. She thought it fitting that her first charge on the ship was BOOZE! LOL.

The women hit the deck and there was a poolside buffet with burgers, dogs, and jerk chicken. They grabbed food to go with the drinks and headed up one flight of stairs. Now they were on the top deck of the ship (deck 12) and the daughter could barely feel it move. They turned the lounge chairs around so they were facing the water and just sat and ate while the ship slowly left the Port of Miami. And it was still 4 bazillion degrees.

After eating and sitting around for about an hour the women were ready to explore the ship since the shops and the casino were open – the women wanted to see what the big floating hotel had to offer. The daughter had put on a seasick patch before they left for the airport that morning so she was doing remarkably well and was having very little problems so exploring was definitely what she wanted to do. They found the theater, the disco, the library, the coffee bar, about 80 restaurants, the jewelry store, and the art gallery. At the point just before the women fell down from exhaustion they headed back to the room…and that is when the problems started.

They got to their tiny room and started to unpack. The daughter didn’t need a lot of drawer space since she only had shorts and tops…she could just put them anywhere. The mother and friend packed their stuff away as well. The friend had the sofa bed that was right next to the balcony and if the bed was out then none of the women could access the balcony so the sofa bed was still folded up. The women spent a little time out on the balcony but it was 3 bazillion degrees and they were all tired so they decided to turn in for the night. That was when they heard a slight noise at the cabin door. The friend went to see what it was and there was a notice in the mailbox. Their shore excursion for the next day had been cancelled due to lack of participants. Well, the women weren’t put out at all since that meant they could sleep later in the morning and they would save the $50 fee.

The friend went to the reception area in order to verify the cancellation and the mother and daughter changed into jammies and slid between the cool, crisp sheets of their beds. The drapes were drawn, the room was dimly lit so the friend wouldn’t kill herself tripping over stuff when she came back, and the temperature was a very pleasant 70 degrees. The mother and daughter were starting to drift off to sleep.

The friend came back in and immediately turned on the lights and the TV. She opened the drapes and the door to the balcony (which automatically turned off the air conditioner) and started talking to the mother and daughter. The mother and daughter, annoyed by the sudden commotion and jarring lights and babble from the TV, asked her to please close the drapes so they would be able to sleep later in the morning. The friend said, “No. this room is too small and I feel claustrophobic with the drapes drawn. Also, I went to check into getting a different room for just me and I can get one without a balcony for $200. I don’t want to spend that money on a room so I will just stay in this one”.

The friend came back in from the balcony and started getting ready for bed, performing the nightly rituals – brush teeth, wash face, etc. She finally pulled out the sofa bed and she too crawled between the cool sheets. She maneuvered a bit to find a relatively comfortable place and then started flipping the channels on the TV. By this time the mother and daughter had had enough of the rudeness and asked her to turn off the TV and go to sleep. It was then explained that the friend had a habit of falling asleep with the TV on. The mother and daughter sighed and laid back down hoping that it wouldn’t take long for the friend to nod off. Fortunately, it took less than 5 minutes and the friend was asleep. The daughter reached over, slid the remote from the friends hand and turned off the incessant noise. The mother turned off the light and all was blissfully quiet, cool, and serene…and then the snoring started.

Next blog: In Freeport, getting naked in public, having an aneurism, and a Foodie’s paradise…next time on AS THE BOAT FLOATS.

Color Me Stupid

2008-09-28T19:07:00.001-04:00

We interrupt this blog to bring you a special bulletin.

If you know your friend is selfish, a control freak, and ungrateful on a normal day don’t expect her to be any other way when she is moving to a new home. In fact, when she is under stress expect her to be all of those things, just more so

I’m just saying…

The Cruise - Day 1

2008-09-25T10:09:00.002-04:00

The day the three women left for the cruise everyone was up very early. In order to catch their 7:20 AM flight they had to leave for the airport at 4:15. Once there, the friend headed to First Class check in and the mother and daughter headed for general check in. The mother and daughter had 3 bags between them and were unaware that the airline the friend booked them on charged $25 for additional bags. First class however, can check 2 bags per person with no additional charge.

Since they had so much time to wait until the flight, the three women went to breakfast before heading to their gate. After that, it was boarding time and all went well. The first leg of the trip was fine, the mother and daughter had aisle seats and had things to keep them occupied. The second leg of the trip was also fine as the same arrangement was made on the second flight as the first.

When they arrived in Miami they had to go collect their luggage and find the cruise line representative. The representative, Jorge, was a very nice gentleman and carted their luggage to the meeting point for the cruise line. Once there the women found that the shuttle to the ship would not leave for another hour. The daughter asked how much a cab to the ship would cost. Turns out it would cost the same amount as the shuttle. The daughter asked if they could get a refund for the shuttle and just take a cab and everyone laughed…but the daughter was serious. She was tired of being in the airport, tired of travelling and tired of being hot and sticky. They waited the hour for the shuttle.

Once they arrived at the port, they checked in and got their room keys. The room keys are multi-functional since they also serve as a credit card. The ship charges a certain amount on the credit card of your choice and then that amount is the balance on the room key card. So anything that is purchased on the ship just goes on that card. It is convenient, but also sneaky on the ship’s side since it is easy to lose track of what is charged from day to day.

After they checked in it was time to find their room. There were phone calls made before the arrival concerning an upgrade and before the women went to their room the friend wanted to check on the status of the upgrade. That had to be done on the reception deck of the ship so it was onto the ship the women went.

As soon as they stepped on the ship they were greeted by a ship member holding a tray of champagne flutes. They each took a flute and headed to the atrium to sit and look out the huge windows. They headed towards the atrium so the friend could go check on their upgrade status. The mother and daughter sat and relaxed and waited. And waited…and waited. Finally the friend came back and by this time the mother and daughter were annoyed because they had to wait so long. When they asked what took so long the friend stated that she went and booked her next cruise…oh, and they didn’t get the upgrade. The mother and daughter just exchanged glances – they were too tired to do much else.

When they arrived at their cabin they were greeted by their luggage at the door. Once inside they were surprised to see how small the room was. They were told that the room would sleep three but the cruise line failed to mention that the three it slept would need to be super model thin and midget short. At that point they were just happy to be in the room – and they did have a balcony.

Next Blog: The departure, the party, the balcony and the drapes. Stay tuned for more of...As the Boat Floats.

The Cruise - Prologue

2008-09-24T20:20:00.000-04:00

Once upon a time there were three women (actually, there were more than that but for the purposes of this story, there are just three main ones), a mother, a daughter, and a friend. One day the friend visited the mother and daughter and said, “Lets take a cruise. I can get us a great deal on a cruise to the Bahamas if you book it through me. And my cost for the cruise is only going to be $175” The mother and daughter thought about it and decided to go ahead. They each paid the $419 for the cruise.

A few weeks later the friend said that they all had to make their airline reservations since the cruise was out of Miami. The mother and daughter started thinking it over and decided to see what was available leaving from the Port of Baltimore since that was only 30 minutes away. Considering the cost of airfare was an additional $300 on top of the cruise price, the mother and daughter started looking into cruises in the $700 range. The friend said that she didn’t like any of the cruises out of Baltimore and that she was happy with the one out of Miami. So the mother and daughter paid an additional $300 for airfare…in coach. The friend used her frequent flier miles to book her ticket…in first class.

After another few weeks, it was time to book the shore excursions for the days that the ship was going to be in port. The friend wanted to hang out on the beach and do some shopping, the mother and daughter wanted to do some adventures. The mother and daughter booked their shore excursions separately and decided to see what the friend was going to do. Meanwhile, the friend booked their shuttle to and from the ship…at an additional cost of $30.

While the mother and daughter were looking at the website for the cruise they checked out the fares to see how much of a great deal they were getting by booking through their friend. Turns out there was no benefit since the fares the general public got was the same as the fares were the same. Turns out, the only person who got a deal was the friend…who booked her cruise at $175 and paid absolutely nothing to fly there and back in first class. However, if the friend had listened to the mother and daughter and caught a cruise out of Baltimore it would have cost her $700 – the same amount as the mother and daughter…no wonder she was happy with the cruise out of Miami.

The mother and daughter said nothing about it to the friend at this point.

Conspiracy Theory

2008-08-22T11:36:00.004-04:00

I think there is a conspiracy afoot to keep me in Maryland. This is why I think this:

This summer has been beautiful. The weather has been so nice that I have been able to keep the house open for weeks now. It is the perfect summer weather – mid 80’s and low humidity.

The calls I am getting for interviews are all in this area. I have only gotten a few calls from New England.

The economy in MD is much better than it is in New England. Gas is getting cheaper too.

Michael has suggested that I go back to school. This last one is important because it says he acknowledges that it may take me a while to get a job in NE, and in the meantime I might as well do something productive.

I still adore my house. My house is pretty big (5 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms) and I just love the setup. When we go to NE I wont have as much house and will probably have to get rid of some furniture.

All things considered: It makes more sense for me to stay...but I dont love it here the way I do RI. And I think that is the biggest factor for moving. I have to go where my heart lives - conspiracy or no...

The Business of Death

2008-08-22T11:24:00.002-04:00

My best friend, Trala’s, dad is dying. It is real now. Before, he was just sick and everyone was trying to get him healthier and accommodate his new needs. Well, last Tuesday he went into the hospital because he had fluid around his heart, again. They admitted him to Hospice Wednesday night. Trala has said that he wont pass away in the next week, but he probably wont last a month. *sigh*

I don’t know what to do for her. I adore Trala and she has helped me cope with some stuff without even knowing she was being helpful. She is always truthful - sometimes to the point of hilarity, one comment she made about me not being a nice person made me laugh so hard my asthma started acting up – and is scarily logical. But death, and imminent death, is not logical. No, that isn’t right, death is logical and expected, the grief associated with death is not logical. I mean it is logical that one would feel grief, but it is not that cut and dried. It isn’t a linear progression, everyone’s grief is different, and some feel it more than others.

Then there is the business of death. All of the little details that have to be taken care of after a death. Not the funeral or the reception, but the stuff afterwards: the removal of the deceased from the legal papers and the accounts, the life insurance, and the last of the medical bills. Stuff that you know is going to have to be taken care of but when they come it is strange that it is so impersonal. A death disrupts the lives of those left, but to others it is just…business.

I have cooked individual meals for the family and frozen them so they can eat something quick without having to think about it. I think the best I can do for Trala and her family is to just support them right now. But I am having a hard time doing that because of the death business. There are already so many services for families during this time that it is difficult to find anything that hasn’t been taken care of. That is good for Trala and her family, but hard for me. I have offered my services in any way I can so I will just wait until they need me. Have I mentioned that I am not good at waiting?

No Excuses

2008-08-11T11:03:00.001-04:00

Wow, I cant believe it has been so long since I blogged. Things have been pretty busy though.

I fostered 4 kittens this season Tank, Happy, Solo, and Winter.
Mum is here so I have been busy doing things with her
We spent a week in Newport, RI
And, once again, we are getting the house ready to go on the market.

Yeah, I know, we just took it off the market! But now I have decided that Newport is where I want to end up. I know this sounds fickle and that I don’t really know what I want, but that isn’t the case. I have always wanted to go back to Newport. I go back for a visit every year just because it kills me to stay away. This year, we delivered Solo to our dear friends in Newport and after discussing it with Michael we have decided to go back permanently.

The reason we didn’t consider it earlier is because the cost of living is the same there as it is here, except the housing prices are even higher. Add that to the economy of the state being in trouble and it isn’t the first choice of any sane person. But no one ever said the Traveling Andersons were sane. Lol. So now we are prepping for a move

I have been working with a headhunter in Boston and have been sending resumes out to as many places as I can. I have also been looking into apartments there and different areas to live in MA and East RI. Michael is getting ready for a move also. He only had 7 classes left for his degree so he is taking them all in this coming semester. Additionally, he scheduled them all for Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday so he can come up to RI on Friday to spend the weekend with me when I finally get a job. While I don’t envy him his courseload (23 credits) I do envy him going to school. I so want to jump back into academia. Sigh, maybe spring semester.

Now that I know I am going back to RI I am anxious to just go. I am so close to suggesting that we just pack up and go and I will find a job when I get there. That wouldn’t be rational and would just cause more stress so I don’t. But it is hard to stay here when I know it would be so easy to go there. And with fall on it’s way staying here is even harder.

The Kitty Whisperer

2008-07-12T12:09:00.001-04:00

Oh my God!!! I have become the Kitty Whisperer!!

A neighbor brought me a poor starving little kitten because she knew I took care of cats. Ugh!! Now there are 7 cats in my house. Trala told me that since I am not working at the moment that I should find out the requirements for being considered an animal rescue and maybe get money from the government. At first I laughed but now I am starting to think about it!

The feeding and the litter box maintenance alone are getting to be a full time job. I only have to feed the older cats 2X a day but the kittens need to be fed every 3-4 hours because of their caloric needs. Also, because Cheese is a chow hound I have to watch and make sure he doesn’t shove the kittens out of the way and eat their food.

The 2 kittens I have been fostering for a while are coming along great. In fact, in a week Solo is going to his new home in Rhode Island. I have some dear friends who are looking for a kitten for their son, Ethan, and I happen to have a great kitten for a little boy. I really think this is going to be a good match since Solo is a really active and sweet kitten. I think they will have fun with him.

Wynter is going to a friend here in Maryland and he will be ready to go in 3 more weeks. Wynter is eating and using the litter box well, but he is only 5 weeks old and isn’t ready to go developmentally. He is learning at the normal rate and is a good size for a 5 week old, but he is still a baby and therefore has to grow a little more before he can go to his Forever home.

That leads us to the new kitten. He is a grey and white tabby and is as cute as a button. He was a stray/feral but every time you touch him he purrs. He doesn’t mind being picked up and carried around and loves having his chin scratched. I have never had a feral react this way. I know he was a feral because I know who his mom is and I have been trying to catch him for weeks. In fact, he is Tank’s brother!

He disappeared a few days ago and we just thought that a fox from the woods across the street got him. We were keeping an eye out for a body or any clue that he was killed. Then Kim called and when she described him to me I knew instantly who it was.

He still has some feral tendencies such as the skittishness and the desire to run anytime there is a quick movement or noise. But if you talk soothingly to him and approach slowly he stays put and you can pet him and pick him up. The touching and holding are the biggest hurdles. If you can get a feral cat to trust you enough to hold him, that is about 80% of the socialization process. I think in a month he will be a normal housecat and will be ready to go to a Forever Home.

But still, 7 cats in one house? I have a big house, but sheesh! I have become the Crazy Cat Lady!!

Mum and the Air Conditioner

2008-07-02T09:18:00.001-04:00

Well, Mum made it in okay and we have been running since she got here. I think today we are actually going to rest.

Mum’s flight got in about an hour and a half late but that actually worked out fine since it gave Michael and I a chance to grab some supper. We snatched her from the airport and then came back to the house. Since it was about 11:30 when we finally got home we just chatted for a while and went to bed. The next day there was shopping to do!! And then everyone wanted to catch up with her so we went out to supper with some friends. She is going to be here until the middle of November so there is plenty of time to get crap done.

A few years ago my parents sold almost everything they had and used the money to move to California. Now that they are ‘unencumbered’ they travel more and do more fun things. They bounce between my sister in San Diego and me in Maryland, spending roughly 6 months at each place. The plan at first was to spend spring and fall with me and winter and summer in CA but for some reason that isn’t what happened. Mum just visits when she wants to and weather be damned. Lol.

On a different note:

We were having supper the other night and were discussing the problem of the temperature control. Our house has a problem with the consistency of the cooling. In the summer the upstairs is definitely hotter than the downstairs. . I like it cold when I sleep. I enjoy snuggling under the blankets (even in the summer) and with it warm upstairs I have a hard time sleeping. Also, the room we use as an office is noticeably warmer in the day than the rest of the upstairs. We have closed all the vents in the basement and most of them on the first floor but that doesn’t really help much. We have installed additional insulation in the attic and have put weather stripping around the attic stairs and that helped a little. Michael built housings and supports and installed 2 HUGE attic fans that push the air out of the roof vent when the attic reaches 125 degrees, that helped a little. We replaced every window in the house and the Heating/Cooling system as well. That helped a lot! But there is still about a 5-degree difference between the two levels. We installed ceiling fans in all 4 of the upstairs bedrooms as well as a huge one in the stairwell and that helped somewhat.

With all of these measures, there is still a difference in temperature between the 2 floors. I now view this as a challenge. There must be some way to remedy this without taking out a second mortgage to do so. Well, Michael suggested a window unit to make up the difference. I balked because there is no way I am going to have a metal tumorous protrusion on my house. I mean it makes perfect sense, but no. I would rather be too hot. We once again headed to the attic. Well, it turns out that almost an entire third of the attic covering the office is not insulated well. It has a scant covering of the popcorn insulation but that is it. So off to Home Depot it was.

We picked up more insulation to lay in the attic but we also picked up one of these:
http://www.homedepot.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ProductDisplay?storeId=10051&langId=-1&catalogId=10053&productId=100527430&N=10000003+90401+503451+2647#reviews

We used it yesterday in the office (we hid it behind a piece of furniture) and within 30 minutes I had to increase the temperature because it was getting too cold in the room. Imagine – me, too cold! We left the central air at 72 degrees overnight and just wheeled the unit into the bedroom. It was nice and chilled in there. I actually slept under the down comforter! I am loving this thing! I highly recommend it to anyone looking for a portable unit.

Well, it is time for me to go feed the little crack heads so I am outta here.

I'm Done

2008-06-23T01:28:00.002-04:00

George Carlin Died.

I'm never getting out of bed again.

Dont Feel Like Writing

2008-06-14T11:18:00.002-04:00

AAAAAAaaaahahahahahaaa!!!

I dont feel like writing today. I have a lot of crap to do before I meet Michael in Virginia for supper. I'll catch everyone up later.

2008-06-09T10:15:00.000-04:00

I don’t even know where to start. I guess the bare facts will have to suffice:

My favorite author, ever, has been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s.

It was announced about 6 months ago but I somehow missed it. How could one of the most fantastic satirical minds of our times be afflicted this way? I understand that Alzheimer’s is devastating to anyone and everyone who is diagnosed with it, but this man uses his mind for his craft. Not only is he a writer, but he is a phenomenal writer.

His slightly skewed view of the world around him comes through in his writing. In Eric (a parody of Gothe’s Faust) through the lead character[1] he further explores the politics and hypocrites of religion as well as basic human nature. In this story even Satan is banished to administrative work through a coup by his contemporaries. In Jingo he explores basic human greed and stupidity through the appearance of a mythical city located exactly halfway between two very powerful countries. In Feet of Clay he explores cloning and the possible subsequent slavery of an ‘inferior’ race. And Thud is a glaringly obvious satirical look at the mindset of the Middle East.

His seemingly favorite character, Death, has evolved through the books and has even taken time off to go find himself. He has battled the Auditors over what is right rather than what is procedure in Thief of Time, and he did a stint as Santa Claus in Hogfather. His other characters are just as complex and nuanced as Death and the development of them through various plot turns is nothing less than genius. Vimes’ battle with the bottle and his hatred of administration perfectly highlights his determination and pragmatism. Magrat ‘s[2] insecurities and eventual discovery of her own strength can be applied to both men and women. And the inclusion of an Igor[3] into most of the books lends whimsy when the symbolism becomes almost too obvious.

I have looked forward to the annual release of the Pratchett Discworld[4] novels from the moment I discovered him. I have burned through his books upon discovery and have laughed until I cried at some point in each of them. Michael has now become very accustomed to me bursting out laughing in bed simply because I tend to read them there. I see his characters everywhere in real life.

I know it is incredibly selfish of me to feel this way but I feel I am losing part of my family. When the Discworld ends, so do some of the most charming, twisted characters I have ever had the pleasure of discovering.

[1] who is Rincewind the wizard rather than Eric
[2] yes, that is the proper spelling…there was a typo on her birth certificate and she was doomed to go through life
as Magrat instead of Margaret
[3] Igors are a specific race of …people…who have devoted their lives to the service of others. This tradition, as well
as most of the body parts, has been handed down through the generations.
[4] So named because that world is flat, like a disc…and yes, people fall off the rim of it.

It Really Exists

2008-06-08T11:56:00.000-04:00

Okay, so something interesting happened to me the other day. I was out running errands and when I came back home and walked in the door, I noticed that it smelled like butt in my house. Well, the litter boxes were clean (and that is a different smell anyway) and I had showered this month (that, too, is a different smell) so I couldn’t figure out what it was.

I put down all my stuff, petted the kitties and started to follow my nose to find out where the smell was. After some twists and turns down long hallways and dark tunnels, I found myself in a huge cavernous room. It was bright and sunny and it looked like the room had a purpose at one time. I took the time to wander around a bit, and the kitties had followed me so I kept an eye on them. I figured if anything dangerous was lurking then the kitties would notice it first.

Upon further inspection, I found a large upright box with a handle on it. I took a deep breath and pulled. I was immediately awash with cool air. There was a light there and I could see all kinds of brightly colored things living there. I must have startled them because they didn’t move as I stood watching them. I eventually closed the lower door and pulled the upper handle. Again, there was light and more of those brightly colored creatures but they were much colder. After observing no discernable movement I just closed the door and let them resume their lives. I then noticed the front of the structure was covered with random letters. What could this mean? Was it trying to communicate with me? I waited and watched: the only thing written there was www.streetcorner.com which was there when I entered the area.

I stood and looked around for a few minutes…there was something familiar about this room. I could almost put my finger on it but not quite. I continued my observations: there were a lot of flat surfaces - like work spaces, there was a large amount of empty space that reflected the light from the many windows; there was even a water source on the floor that the kitties were drinking out of. Plus there was still the smell.

I again checked for any hidden dangers – this time behind the many doors below and above the empty work spaces. I was surprised to see that there were brightly colored creatures living here as well. I figured there must be at least three different species: the room temperature ones, the cold ones, and the very cold ones. These were timid also since they didn’t move the entire time I stared at them. I eventually closed the door and continued. That feeling of familiarity was still tugging at the back of my brain…I felt like I had been here before.

I found another box cleverly camouflaged with the flat workspaces. At first I thought it was just another work space, but a different color. Then I noticed that it was some kind of device since it had turn knobs on it. I turned one and immediately the surface of the work space went from grey to red and I could feel the heat radiating off of it. I could think of many uses for a contraption like this. I wondered if I could take it back with me when I left.

The smell was getting closer so I decided to try to locate it. I found the source of the smell a few feet away in a tub type area. Upon closer inspection I noticed there were plates and silverware in the tub. That feeling of knowing was becoming very strong now. I stared at the eating utensils in the basin…I then realized there was a water source there as well. I reached up and pulled the handle and cool refreshing water came out of the spigot. I was so close to knowing now I could almost reach out with my hand and grab it.

My breath caught in my throat and I spun around…the upright box, the doors, the heat making contraption…I had found the fabled KITCHEN. I just stood and stared with my mouth hanging open and my eyes wide. I had found it again! I was struck with wonder and I started touching all the surfaces. It was a good thing the water was still running because I burned my hand on the heat making box, but other than that warning bite the Kitchen was still docile. I wondered at the food items in the boxes and behind the doors. I have never seen food in its infant state of Containerism, I have only seen it in its mature state- on a plate next to a drink with an umbrella in it.

I think I stayed there, in the Kitchen, for an hour just exploring and reveling in its wonders. The water resistant floor, the Storm in a Box that some one had placed even more eating utensils, the odd growths on the workspaces that looked like a coffee maker (just smaller) and storage apparatuses. Finally the smell started to get to me and the kitties were leaving, one by one. I figured I had better follow them out or I may lose consciousness and never get back. The trip back to the house was uneventful and rather quick, I could see the front door after a few turns and knew I was on the right track.

Later that evening, I started to tell Michael what I had explored that day. I attempted to convey the wonder and majesty of the mythical Kitchen and my amazing adventure in it. He sat on the chair watching me closely, waiting for the incredible thing he knew I was going to tell him. I took a breath, looked deep in his blue eyes and started... “The dishes are starting to smell funky, they need to be washed.”

Pissed off

2008-06-07T22:54:00.002-04:00

I have been seeing advertisements for the show Army Wives on Lifetime. I had dismissed it as a glorification of the military and the soap opera-ization (if that is even a word) of what military wives go through. There is an Army Wives marathon on today so I thought this would be a good time to explore the series. I have watched one episode and I know everything about all of the characters. The writing is bad and predictable. Within the first fifteen minutes of the episode I knew how the episode would end because I have seen the same episode about twenty other times on ten different series.

But other than that, this is why the show is shit:

There is all this crap about the military wives code and how they have to protect each other. Bullshit, we all just live our lives.

After watching 3 episodes I am now afraid of any Army veteran. At least once an episode an army dude from Iraq comes home, goes nuts, and kills everyone in their general vicinity. I am thinking this isn’t really the norm anywhere except on this show. I understand that the veterans who come home have been overworked, over deployed, and probably have PTSD to some extent, but don’t make it look like our military is full of guys who could go nuts and take us all out if the commissary doesn’t have their brand of ice cream one day.

I understand that the show is on Lifetime, but sheesh! It is like watching Army Steel Magnolias. There is the one central wife who is strong, stoic, and all knowing. She is infallible and her hair always looks great. Then there are 4 supporting players who have the problems that she has to fix. Give me a freaking break.

This show doesn’t accurately portray military life. It is the Army Soap Opera and plays on all women’s fears and emotions, whether they are military or not: Will my kids grow up to be stoner skate rats, will my husband get in a car wreck on the way home and die (as mentioned above, his chances of being taken out in the commissary one day are much, much greater), does this watchband make me look fat…

But the worst part is that they have taken something very personal and private to some women and by televising it have succeeded in trivializing it. They made it look like when the dudes leave for their macho, testosterone filled existence in the hot sand, that the wives lives are still just as easy and the only problems they have are the dreaded watchband issue and who they are trying not to sleep with next. They don’t show the crippling sadness, the children who act out because they miss their parent and cant express their pain, the logistical difficulties like carpooling, work demands and trash removal that just work better with a 2 parent home. They don’t show how hard it is to just live when a military spouse gets left behind.

And yes, I know that when we marry our military spouses that we signed up for the leaving. We leave our friends, our home, our family, our comfort zones. But it is still okay because we leave as a couple. It is okay when we leave all of these things together. But after all of the leaving, it is still such a horrible, painful thing to be left. It doesn’t matter how strong, capable or well liked you are. When your spouse leaves your home to do a job, it hurts. A lot.

And to those people who don’t think the military wives are really ‘in the military’ I say, Fuck You. We serve too. We go to the shitty formal balls and eat lukewarm food with people we don’t like. We attend office functions and eat store bought cake with blue frosting that turns your lips the same frightening color. We sit on the bleachers in the heat and the mosquitoes to watch the office softball team lose…again. We cry when one of ours doesn’t come back and we secretly thank the Higher Power that it wasn’t the one we have given our heart to.

As a 20 year military wife veteran, don’t tell me I didn’t serve, and if you are going to put us in the spotlight, make it at least believable.

Dumbasses. Fuck you. Now I am all pissed.

Ugh! Too Much Work

2008-05-20T22:08:00.003-04:00

Sheesh!! I had forgotten how nerve-wracking kittens are.

Tank is 6 weeks old and is pretty self sufficient when it comes to input and output. He eats fine and goes to the litter box with minimal supervision. He is apparently in the Stepping in the Doodles phase of development. He goes to the litter box and then scratches so much you would think he was going to china. When he hops out of the litter box not only has he NOT covered up the doodles, he has also stepped in it. So now I have to chase him down (the little shit hops fast!) and endure his kitten curse words while I wash off his feet and hiney. Other than that he is getting along well.

The nerve wracking part is that he is so small that I constantly have to keep checking on him to make sure he hasn’t gotten himself stuck somewhere or that Cheese hasn’t mistaken him for a challenging snack. Also, I cant seem to get his plumbing sorted out. Either he poops soup or he is constipated. His poor little booty is starting to look sore. It has only been 2 days now but he is so friendly and comfortable with us that I forget it hasn’t been that long. I know the doodle situation will work out, but in the meantime I am constantly thinking that he is going to get the runs and die and it will be all my fault.

Add that to the fact that we acquired a 3 week old kitten yesterday and he still wont eat. We have the formula for him and the bottles but he doesn’t like it. He refuses to latch on to the bottle and suck! It has been 24 hours now and I think I have gotten a whole ounce in him. I keep trying and we both end up a sticky mess. After the force feeding session he is pissed and I am worried. I am going to try a different formula in a couple of hours to see if it is the formula and not the bottle. I don’t know what to do with him if he wont eat. I will probably end up taking him to the vet in desperation.

Well, I am off to find the poop machine and perhaps take care of some doodle maintenance.

Meet Tank

2008-05-19T21:57:00.007-04:00

Well, this little guy was found under the shed in my side yard. I knew his mom - PuffPuff -had kittens about 6 weeks ago but I wasnt able to find them in time to take them and socialize them.

Sunday, I was working in the sewing room and my kitty, Autumn, was fascinated with something outside. I went to the bedroom window to get a better view and still couldnt see anything. Michael, however, could, and told me that there was a black and white kitty down there. So, thinking that it was PuffPuff's kittens, I headed down with Michael in tow. Once down there, I had Michael look under the shed but I doubted anything could be under there since the hole was too small. Michael shone the flashlight under there but didnt see anything. He went back in and I just sat at the little table and chair set that is right there. A few minutes later Michael came out with kitty treats which I scattered in front of the hole under the shed.

While I was waiting, PuffPuff wandered around the side yard and froze in her tracks. She is used to humans but no one can pet her or get close to her. When I saw her I knew her kittens were under our shed. This was not going to be fun. I sat as still as I could and just waited. Slowly a tiny paw crept out and stole one of the treats. PuffPuff had slunk closer to the shed and kept a wary eye on me. After about 5 minutes she was close enough for the kitten to see her and he came bounding out to see mommy. Mommy took off and the kitten darted back under the shed. I hadnt moved a finger but PuffPuff is timid and the kittens take their cues from her. Finally, she moved back to the shed and the kitten came back out. PuffPuff made the mistake of squeezing under the shed and I lunged. The kitten couldnt get under because PuffPuff was blocking the entry so I was able to snatch him up. Lets just say that he was not a happy kitty. I scruffed him and he calmed down a little and I snuggled him against my chest with his back to me. He settled down very fast and I took him to my friend, Jackie's house.

Upon examination it turns out he is a very healthy little boy. He is only about 6 weeks but he is already about 2 pounds which is excellent. And that is why we call him Tank - he is HUGE for 6 weeks, but his development is that of a 6 week old kitten. He eats kitten food - both hard and soft - and uses the litter box. I am still teaching him to lap water, and I feel like a total shit for doing it. I bring him to the water bowl and push his nose in it real fast. He hates it and I feel like a bad mommy, but there is no other way to teach him. In the meantime, in order to get fluid in him I mix his wet food with water so it makes a barf colored gruel. He loves it, I get fluid in him, so it works out for all of us.

I am keeping him in the guest room (yes, your room, Mum) and it was just luck that we hadnt filled the waterbed up yet. We had assembled the frame but that was it. Now it is a temporary playpen for the kitten. It is large enough for his bedding, food, water, and small litterbox to be far enough from each other to be acceptable for him, but the sides are high enough (at the moment) to keep him contained within. When I am upstairs I let him run around...well, he hops around really. He is still pretty uncoordinated but he is learning, and he is really cute when he runs/hops.

The most surprising part for me - other than his massive size - is that he is completely socialized. Other than the first 2 minutes when I grabbed him he has not shown any agression or antisocial tendencies. He purrs when I talk to him (which is totally charming), he has met the other cats (they have more of a problem with him than the other way around) and when he gets tired of playing he seeks me out to snuggle (again, completely charming). He has no problem being held by anyone and even Michael has snuggled him.

He has a home already, and as soon as she returns from vacation next week Tank will go to his new home. I am happy for this week, so I can make sure he is a good pet. I always make sure the plumbing works right and that the kittens are trained and used to humans. This little guy was the easiest kitten I have done. I got very lucky considering his age.

Tired Tonight

2008-05-15T22:49:00.002-04:00

I have spent all day at the mall and just got home a couple of hours ago. I am tired and am going to bed soon. I am posting the Too-Cute-For-Words pix for today and I will post an update soon...maybe even tomorrow.

This Just In...

2008-05-09T13:12:00.003-04:00

Bee-bee Kitties are kyoot Kyoot Kyoot!!!
Just see for yourself.
These were taken before the little boy passed away and I am just now getting the pix up. Sorry.

Sad News with a Good News Chaser

2008-05-09T13:03:00.002-04:00

Well, we lost a baby poodin. Well, we didn’t really lose it…we know where it is. It just isn’t living any longer. I noticed that it wasn’t gaining any weight and that it’s output wasn’t looking like it should. I called the vet and she said that there really wasn’t anything that could be done for it since it was so tiny, and that we just had to wait and see what would happen. Well, it died later that night. It always kills me when we lose a poodin.

On a brighter note:

The one that is still with us is definitely thriving. We have named her Bella-Gigi and she is certainly growing to be as beautiful as her name. I have included some AAWWWWW pix so try not to slip into a diabetic coma. LOL

The Anderson Idea of Humor

2008-05-07T16:30:00.004-04:00

Yeah...this is what passes for humor in our house.

The first line is mine, the second is the hubby's response to the first.

ahhh...love is grand.

Kyoot Bebe Poodins!!!

2008-05-02T09:00:00.001-04:00

We have baby poodins!!! They are soooo kyoot kyoot kyoot!!!!

I was puttering around the house last week and my neighbor came over and showed them to me. They were just a day old and still had their umbilical cords attached. Apparently the momcat had the babies in the garage and then decided to bring them into the house.

The momcat is a stray and had the kittens in the garage. After she did she got the attention of my neighbor and led her to them as if to say, “Look what I made for you!!” Jackie, my neighbor, ooh-ed and ahh-ed over them and then went back in the house. Shortly after that, momcat was at the back screen…with a kitten. Jackie couldn’t imagine that she would want to bring the kitten in but opened the door anyway. Sure enough, momcat brought the kitten in and made herself at home. Now, Jackie has other cats so this wasn’t going to go over well with them. And momcat was screaming at any kitty who even looked her way. So we put the kitty bed (where she had stashed her kittens) in a large crate. Momcat hopped into the crate to be with the kittens and we locked it up and put a towel over it. We then moved it back into the garage where she stayed for a day before trying to bring the kittens back into the house.

The second time she brought the kittens into the house, Jackie moved them and momcat into a bedroom that she wasn’t using. She gave them a nice soft flannel sheet to bed in, food, water, and a litter box. Momcat didn’t leave for 2 days and was pretty happy and content. Now though, momcat goes outside and leaves the kittens for a couple of hours at a time. When that happens Jackie and I rush upstairs and grab the kittens and snuggle them to within an inch of their lives. LOL.

They are 10 days old today and their eyes are starting to open. I am a little concerned about the boy because his…uhhh…output is a different color than what it should be. I called the vet and there isn’t really anything that they can do since they are sooo tiny still. So we are just waiting to see if it resolves itself. If it doesn’t, then we are going to have to take the kitten and start bottle-feeding it to see if that will correct the issue.

Oh, and of course there are photos.

Julia – I think this is what your poodins probably looked like…with the exception of Gracie who is a little fluffball. LOL

2008-05-01T09:19:00.001-04:00

Oh my God!! It just keeps getting worse…

The plumbers are here. We still have the leak in the shower. They suggested getting the tile person in to pull up the tiles and check for leakage in the floor. Then they cut a hole into my closet. AND THEN THEY FOUND THE LEAK!!

Well, at least they found the leak. It was in the piping leading up to the shower head. Apparently, when Wayne put everything together he didn’t solder things correctly and now every time I turn on the water it runs down the pipe, into the sub flooring and drips through the ceiling. I could just kill Wayne. At least it is getting fixed though. As soon as they finish with my shower they are going to give us an estimate on routing the pipes to the small upstairs bedroom so we can turn that into the laundry room. That way the laundry room will be upstairs instead of in the basement. Yippee!! That is what I am really looking forward to. Then I can put clothes away as we do them, not all at once when they come up from the basement.

There is good news and bad news: There has been improvement and a minor setback in the knee situation.
First the good news:

The knee is definitely getting stronger. I am able to walk around normally now. I don’t look like Igor dragging one leg behind me ( the crouching and lisp is still there though, “Yeth Masther”).

It doesn’t hurt as much as it once did – though to be honest, it never really hurt that much – now the pain is an occasional thing when I do something without thinking about my knee. Before, there was always an ache down my LCL and in my hamstring.

I walked on the treadmill yesterday at Physical Therapy.

Michael is getting very good at stretching my knee out. The passive stretches I have him do feel really good after I have done my knee exercises.So that is the good news.

And now the not so good news:

The discouraging thing is that I walked on the treadmill yesterday for 4.5 minutes and my knee buckled. I didn’t fall and it wasn’t painful, but I had to stop anyway so I wouldn’t do any more damage. I then went to the bike and did 10 minutes on that. I really hate that damn bike. I have never liked the bike but now I hate it because I have to do it every day in order to strengthen my knee further.

So in all, I think progress is being made and I can – hopefully - avoid the surgery. I have my Drs appt on the 6th this month so I should know more then.

Bum Knee Update

2008-04-29T09:49:00.001-04:00

Well the good news is that I am up and about. The bad news is that we wont know anything about my knee for another 2 weeks.

I have a torn ACL, a torn LCL, a posterior tear in the medial Meniscus, and a pulled hamstring. Whew! When I do something, I do it right. When I went back to the orthopedic surgeon all the muscles in my knee were still in spasm so he sent me to physical therapy for 4 weeks. I am in the second week and I go three times a week. The exercises arent hard or grueling…they just hurt. There are lots of stretching and strengthening, and mobility exercises that I do. PT usually takes about 2 hours a visit and then I come home and ice the knee for about an hour. I go back to the orthopedic surgeon in about 2 weeks to see if I need the surgery. If we can strengthen my muscles enough that they make up for the lack of tendon stability, then I wont need the surgery. If we get the muscles as strong as they can be and I still have a lot of instability, then I will need the surgery anyway. As of now, I am still convinced that I can do this and avoid the surgery. There is nothing that I haven’t been able to do once I really decide to do it. I REALLY REALLY don’t want surgery.

The Couch Chronicles

2008-04-15T12:04:00.000-04:00

Today is my appt with the orthopedic surgeon again. Hopefully he will be able to tell me how this is going to be repaired. I am so sick of sitting on this couch. Since I am getting out today I will be able to see my weeping cherry tree in full bloom as well as all of my tulips. I am so bummed that I am not using this time to garden. Normally, by now, my beds would be pristine and well maintained. Sigh…

I have been able to explore the delights of daytime tv though. I regularly tape some shows and that is about all the tv I watch. I always get Jeopardy and some shows on adult swim but the rest of the tv broadcasts make my brain ache. I have been listening to books on CD and cross stitching but that can only entertain me for about 4 hours at a time so I have been mucking through the channels. I have been staying within the safe channels for the most part – Discovery Channel, The History Channel, Biography – but every once in a while I get brave and venture into the cloudier recesses of the channel pool. To my surprise I have added another show to the list that I already tape regularly: Good Eats. I ventured over to the Food Network one day and there it was. At first I thought it was a science show on the wrong channel but the more I watched it the more I was fascinated. It is a delightful blend of science, food, and pure camp. Being a goofball and a foodie I loved it. I love knowing tricks and the why’s of food. They also throw in history, techniques, culture, and folklore. I was enthralled.

Unfortunately not all my experiences were that pleasant. One afternoon, out of desperation, I ventured into the dark depths of daytime broadcasting. I was at first encouraged by Ellen. That wasn’t too bad. But then I was thrust, unprepared, into the Oprah show. Reeling from the shock, I blindly began changing channels. I sunk further into the muck – Jerry Springer. Blindly stabbing at the remote to relieve the pain to my eyes I found a channel with a commercial. I never thought I would be so happy for advertising. Of course it was for a trade school but that was okay…at least it gave me a chance to catch my breath. Whew! When I had become more rational I gingerly changed the channel back to my safe station – Discovery. By this time I was feeling brave…I had ventured into the slimy end of the pool and other than some retinal damage, I had survived. Well, the adrenaline rush was addictive so I headed right back – only this time I randomly chose a number and punched it into the remote. As luck would have it, I ended up on a shopping channel…a jewelry shopping channel to be exact. I was mesmerized by the nonstop babble of the sales person. There weren’t any quality pieces but you would never know it from listening to the huckster. I stayed there just to see what the next piece was going to be…and then the next one…and the next one. When I finally got tired of it I had watched for a good 30 minutes. Huh. I am the first to admit that anything shiny will attract my attention – after all, my favorite color is Sparkly – but from the format of the show, I am apparently not the only one. I think today I will try another random channel. After I get some pain pills in me…

Update From the Couch

2008-04-14T21:34:00.000-04:00

I find this whole situation a bit amusing. I mean, the knee doesn’t hurt if I just sit here. I don’t even have to take Advil so it seems silly to just be sitting here all day doing nothing. But, as soon as I get up to get a drink or hit the ladies room my knee tells me to sit my ass right back down. So while I am sitting here I am all frustrated because I FEEL FINE. I sat in the hot tub last night for about an hour and I didn’t notice a difference in the knee but it was really nice out there. The hot tub was about 100 degrees and there was a cool breeze blowing. Aaahhhhh…heaven.

Since I have the films from the MRI I called my neighbor the Dr to see if he could make heads or tails of them. My neighbor is a Dr at Union Memorial Hospital. In fact his official title is Medical Director - Acute Rehab Unit. He is also the Department Chief and was in Baltimore Magazine as one of the top 10 doctors in Baltimore in his field. Hell, had I known all that, I would have injured myself a lot sooner. You would think that with all those accolades and all that prestige he would be an ass. The truth is, he is one of the most personable people I know…both him and his wife are just great people. We got soooo lucky when they moved in next door. The neighbor on the other side of us is a Physical Therapist. So I got the diagnosis and the recovery covered!

Well, the good Dr looked over the films and pointed out where the joint looked ‘junky’ and that was where the tear was. He also repeated what the orthopedic surgeon said in that when there is an injury of this type there is usually more damage than just one part. So he believes that not only did I tear my meniscus, but I may have torn a ligament or tendon as well and that is why mechanically my knee doesn’t work. Well, if you are going to do something, do it right!

Tomorrow I have my appt with my orthopedic surgeon so I should know something more after that. I am all excited that I am getting out of the house. My cherry tree is blooming along with all of my tulips and I AM MISSING IT! I hope to be repaired soon because I have planting to do. I bought lots of starters and was really looking forward to planting. Dahlias…Phlox…Columbines…sigh…

Stuck on the Couch

2008-04-12T15:20:00.003-04:00

Well shit. I broke my knee. Well, I don’t know for sure but here is the story:

I had been going to the gym for a week. I had been doing the treadmill and using all of the facilities and was just, in general, loving my gym. I got out of the house, it made me feel better, and I was doing something good for me. I had the best day ever at the gym just the day before my knee got injured. I went later in the evening, walked on the treadmill, forced myself to stop after 45 minutes (I was loving the endorphin rush) and then went and sat in the sauna for about 20 minutes. OMG! What a great way to finish a work out. After my shower, I hopped in the car and floated home. I walked in with this huge shit eating grin on my face and when Michael saw it he asked, “good work out?” only the best work out ever!

The next day I had an appt with the personal trainer. We were going to be doing upper body. I started on the bike for 15 minutes. Then we went to the weights to work out. We ended up at the free weights and I started doing some shoulder work. In between sets he had me do jumping jacks. I got through the first set just fine. The second set of jumping jacks however, is when it happened. I was supposed to do 15 of them and I got to number 10 and my knee popped and I just about hit the floor. I stopped and told him what happened and he said, “Huh, that’s odd. Does it hurt?” Well it didn’t so we just kept going…except that I refused to do any more jumping jacks. I finished the upper body workout and then we headed back up the stairs to do the ab part of the training. I noticed at this time that if I extended my leg all the way out, it wouldn’t support any weight…so I didn’t do that. I held my leg at an angle, made it up the stairs and finished the ab workout. From there I did another 15 minutes on the treadmill increasing the incline and speed every 5minutes. After that I went and stretched, again noticing how my knee would give out if I stood a certain way.

It wasn’t until I was getting in the car that I thought maybe I really hurt it. It is my left knee, which is the leg that supports the weight as I get into the car. Well, it gave out but I pulled myself into the car with the steering wheel and Jesus Handles. I got home and barely made it up the 3 steps to get into the house. I called the Dr on the way to Patient first and they told me that I couldn’t get an appt at the dr office that day but I could go in on Monday. Well this is on Tuesday and I wasn’t about to wait a week to have my leg looked at. I told the receptionist that I was going to be seen that day whether it was at the emergency room or at Patient first and they needed to decide which one to send me to. LOL. By the time they got back to me and told me that I was approved to go to Patient First, I was pulling into the parking lot.

They took x rays and could see no bone damage. By this time it was starting to ache a little and I was feeling like I had overstretched or pulled a tendon or ligament. Well soft tissue damage doesn’t show up on an x ray so I would need an MRI. After everything, I got a knee brace and crutches and was told to see the orthopedic surgeon. I made the appt to go to the orthopedic surgeon the next day and he poked and prodded me until I just about cried. He said that because my kneecap is locked in place and I have almost no movement with out pain, that I probably tore my meniscus. If that is the case, I would have to have surgery to fix the mangled mess. But they wouldn’t know until the MRI results came back. I got the films back from the MRI – I don’t know why he wanted films as opposed to a cd – and Michael and I have looked them over closely since my next appt isn’t until Tuesday.

Since we are not Drs we are obviously experts on the subject so we have concluded that there is no real damage. I just sprained my knee. The fact that it mechanically does not work is kind of beside the point. Lol. The fact that I can’t really move it at all or that it looks kinda deformed just supports the conclusion that it is just a sprain. It will heal on it’s own if I just keep using it and ignore the pain.

That being said, I have been sitting on my ass on this couch for the past 3 days. I have a pillow under my knee and have the recliner part of the couch up. I am surfing, texting, knitting, cross stitching, sleeping and bitching. Emphasis on the bitching, ha ha. The only good part now is that if I go insane, I cant get up to kill anyone!

Here we go again...

2008-03-31T22:06:00.006-04:00

The dinner party went well. I lived and didn’t burn the house down so that is considered a success!

All of our stuff made it out of storage. Our house is a disaster again. It looks like it did before we put the house on the market. We shoved all the stuff in the small dining room and just left it there. I mean really, there was wine to be had! The food turned out perfect and the company was great. The only hard part was steering the conversation to include everyone. Since Steve and Lena were in Newport the same time we were and worked in the same office they talked a lot about the people they used to work with. I had to keep trying to come up with topics that would include everyone. That wasn’t too hard though, and the more wine we had the easier it was to do. Lol.

We spent today cleaning out that small dining room and getting the living room all set up. We moved the TV to the opposite wall and brought down the recliners from the sitting room upstairs. We moved the couch to a different wall and left the window area open. We moved the boxes and the misc furniture to the upstairs and basement rooms that they belong in. Now we are planning on picking a room and completing it before we go to the next one.

We cant start on the next room until Thursday though. I have to be in Rockville tomorrow and then I am going shopping with Lena on Wednesday. So Thursday we are going to start in the office and get it set up and start moving stuff into the guest room. That room doesn’t need to be finished for a while since my mum isnt coming until June.

I have had people ask about my shower so I am adding the pix here. The Eff-er still leaks so we are having the plumber come next week. While he is here we are going to get him to give us an estimate on moving the laundry from the basement to the third floor. That would be so much more convenient and we really aren’t using all 4 of the upstairs bedrooms anyway.

For some reason the last 2 wont upload here so you can go to Flickr and see them. I am going to bed...I am beat.

Insanity Rocks!

2008-03-28T13:52:00.001-04:00

WooHoo!!!

Now that I have gone insane, there is no need to fear it. How did this happen, you wonder? Well, it started like this:

I quit my job to move to Indiana. We then proceeded to put most of our stuff in storage and get the house on the market. We started looking for a place in IN and then realized that I didn’t really want to move after all (combination of loving my house, my neighbors and friends, and the charm of the area…who can beat the Hon Festival). So we took the house off the market and now are starting to bring stuff back from storage. That was still okay…I was still sane at that point.

Then…

We asked a few friends to help us move the heavy stuff out of storage this weekend…

Ok, still sane…

Michael has a tournament on Saturday so all of the moving has to be done on Sunday...

Ok, still sane…

I decide to throw a dinner party and serve my most time consuming dish - lasagna – on Sunday…with homemade Italian bread.

OK, that is where I think I lost my mind: Somewhere in that last sentence. “Well”, you think, “lasagna is an easy dish, just assemble and bake.” Ummm…you have never had my lasagna before. I have had people PAY me to make it for them. I only make it about once a year. Because it takes 2 days to make the shit!

“What can be so difficult about Lasagna? Do you make your own noodles?” No, and that is only because there is no way I can make them better than the store bought kind. Everything else though…

If I have a dinner party on Sunday, I start cooking on Friday. The sauce is home made and you know it tastes better after it sits for a day. I cook it slowly for about 5-8 hours on the first day, and then it rests overnight. The next day I start on the lasagna. I have to make the cheese/spice mixture( grate cheese, mix cheeses, check for right consistency, etc), I have to assemble the individual lasagna rolls, use the sauce I made the day before (heating it up a bit first), assemble in pan (making sure not to crowd the individual rolls), add more sauce, sprinkle with cheese, and then cook the hell out of it for about an hour.

So there is really just a lot to do the 2 days before the party. The day of the party I only have to make the bread (a WHOLE different blog!), make the salad, heat the main course, and open the wines. So really not a lot to do on the actual day…however…the actual day will be filled with me telling people where to put the boxes (heh) and various pieces of furniture. That means my house will look like a disaster area when the guests begin to arrive.

Like I said…now that I have embraced the insanity it isnt really all that bad…

Catching Up

2008-03-25T19:51:00.002-04:00

Well, we finally got back and I didn’t kill anyone. Though, I have to say that at 10 pm on Sunday night it was pretty close.

We left Missouri Sunday morning around 11 am and finally stopped in Columbus OH around 11 hours later. For the most part, I really enjoy road trips. Michael insists on driving the whole way, and I am not going to complain. We get books on cassette and I just listen to the books and knit to my little heart’s content. I get so much knitting done on a road trip. I can get 2 pieces of my quilt finished in an hour and knock out a good book at the same time. This time we listened to a couple of Terry Pratchett books. The man is a friggin genius. He is hysterically funny as well as very insightful. Anyway, we stopped in Columbus at the usual hotel chain and I couldn’t have been happier when we got in the room. I swear, we have been travelling so much lately that the hotel suites feel more like home than our house does! Even with all the travelling and the fact that we lived in a hotel for almost 2 weeks, I still love hotel rooms.

We left the next morning around 11 and got back home around 5. I was happy to be home with my kitties. They all came out to greet us and Autumn Savannah’s feet didn’t touch the ground the whole time I was home. She was either sitting on my shoulder or I was carrying her around. We went to supper with some friends and then came right home. After that I figured the kitties needed some Human Time so I just changed into Jammies and sat on the couch and tried to read. No such luck. Autumn Savannah decided that she had to sit on my lap no matter what and heaven help the poor kitty who got close! I love that cat but she is a bully at times. I finally gave up and just read in bed for a while…at least that way all 4 kitties could spend time with me. Michael was in the basement watching Sports Center and walking on the treadmill. The man is so damn healthy that it is disgusting.

On a brighter note, we are waiting for kittens. We have 2 strays in the cul de sac who are pregnant. During the warm spell they went into heat and I have calculated their due dates from March 31st to April 3rd. the normal gestation period for a cat is 62-63 days so we are getting close. We are trying not to bother the kitties because we don’t want them to move the kittens to a place where we can’t find them. As soon as the kittens are born we usually go on a kitten hunt and then bottle raise them and find good homes for them. It is heartbreaking to take the kittens, but only about 40% of the kittens in our cul de sac make it to adults – they either succumb to the cold, are killed by predators, or get sick and die. I just keep telling myself that it is much better for them this way.

We have tried trapping the 2 females, but they have an abundant supply of food between the neighbors and the woods so they never get curious about the food in the traps. My vet has agreed to do the spay for a minimal charge so all we have to do is trap them. I just hope they reach Kitty Menopause soon, I cant foster every year. In fact, last year I could only foster 2 kittens and we ended up losing 3 of the ones I couldn’t take in time…one was killed by a predator and eaten under my car. With this cold weather hanging on, I just hope the mommy kitties hold out as long as possible…it is too cold for kittens right now.

Anyway, I have to make a storage run…I will write about that whole thing later…

Subtle

2008-03-14T21:51:00.002-04:00

Ok, you know it is time to shave when you show your husband something on your leg and he looks at you and asks, "Wow, are you European now?"

Please! For the sake of Humanity, STOP!!!

2008-03-10T22:23:00.003-04:00

This is not right!!

These are not your lives to take. You are not superior to these animals and cannot dictate when they die. Though I am thinking that death is better for them than what they are suffering though at the moment - People giving their pets away simply because someone tells them to. These pets only crimes were trusting the humans they lived with. Now they are being shoved out the door in the middle of the night to suffer an ordeal that will only lead to their death. If they are lucky they will die quickly so they won’t have to live long with both a broken body and a broken heart. Hopefully they won’t live long remembering the nights sleeping on the beds with their humans, or sitting on their human’s lap during quiet times. Hopefully they won’t live long remembering all the head butts and purr-y kisses they gave to the human they considered their protector and parent and best friend.

It is shit like this that makes me ashamed to be part of the human race. We are not cattle, People! Think for yourselves for a change! It is shit like this that makes me want to go make sure these monsters don’t inflict pain on any additional animals. It is an unspoken rule that animals and children are off limits - mess with someone who can defend themselves.

For fuck’s sake People, we are not superior to animals - we are barely equal to them! In fact, I have never met an animal I didn’t like, but I am surrounded by people I can’t stand. Most animals are better people than the people are! These are not expendable commodities to dispose of at our will – each and every one of these animals serves a purpose…and that purpose is not to show kindergarteners that it is okay to club a pregnant cat and her unborn kittens to death. God! What a painful and terrifying way to die.

Shit, everything I do in order to ensure that any animal near me is healthy and happy is wiped out by stuff like this. All the spays/neuters, all the fostering of newborns, all the rescues I have nursed back to health, all the kitties I have found healthy homes for, ALL OF IT, is wiped out by another human killing indiscriminately. These are not your lives to take…please stop!

Bastards! I hope there is a special place in Hell for them.

Freak!!

2008-03-03T18:07:00.008-05:00

Okay, its official – my cat is a freak. Well, obviously, because she loves me. But really, I have never met a cat that likes this activity. I have tried it on my other cats and they run screaming from the room and then hide for the next 10 hours.

Autumn Savannah loves to be swung around on the office chair. Not just any office chair though, it has to be the one with the arms. She takes a running leap and jumps onto the chair between the back and an arm. That gets the chair spinning on its own. If I am there then it is my duty to make sure she keeps spinning. I spin her one way, and then the other. She hangs onto the back with her paws while sitting on the seat. If I stop she yells at me. In order to get her to forget about spinning for a few minutes I use her “feathers on a stick” toy to distract her. She runs and jumps after that toy like it is her last chance at food. I have to stop and get her to calm down before her one remaining lung pops. She has so much energy and is so active that I keep expecting to stumble across a Kitty Meth Lab one day. What happened to ‘cats sleep 20 hours a day’?

Non Sequiter

2008-03-02T14:17:00.002-05:00

While I was feeding the kitties this morning, I noticed an expiration date on the bottom of the Fancy Feast can.

My question is: How do they know?

Warning Shot

2008-03-01T12:21:00.001-05:00

My dad is 56 years old…and was in the hospital this week for heart problems.

Being from Kansas it is not surprising that he is a ‘meat and potatoes’ kind of guy, and fried is always better – add cheese and it is a food Trifecta. It is also not surprising that he has smoked for 40 years considering 26 of them were spent in the Navy. He is a computer guy so it is not surprising that his activity level is right up there with…mushrooms. I am not surprised his heart was screaming for help. That being said, why was I surprised when my sister called to tell me he was in the hospital? The news threw me even though I knew it would come someday.

They were getting ready to go to the desert – they go and play in the sand dunes with their quads – and my dad was starting to feel worse. He had been having a backache for a few days but now it had moved around to his chest and both his arms. When he started feeling nauseous he decided to go to the Dr. This was an hour before they were supposed to leave for the desert and after all the Dr’s offices were closed. They went to Urgent Care who sent him to the Emergency Room. There they started running tests and decided to keep him overnight. The next day he had a stress test. Immediately after that they scheduled him for an angiogram.

The diagnosis was 3 blocked arteries - 2 of them at 75% and the other at 100%. The one that was 100% blocked was forming offshoots so his body was actively trying to remedy the situation (I think that is good). The day after the angiogram they did the Balloon Angioplasty and inserted stents in the arteries to open them up. The Dr’s finished the arteries that were 75% blocked and Dad was doing so well that they went ahead and tried to do the artery that was 100% blocked. They were successful with that one as well. Yippee! Dad went home yesterday with instructions to see a cardiologist and to change his lifestyle. This is where the hard work begins.

Considering the fact that I was not surprised to get the phone call from my sister, I was surprised by my reaction to it. I was not panicked even though they are in San Diego and I was unable to be there and boss people around. In fact I got the call around midnight and was calm enough to go to bed shortly afterwards. I kept the phones on the headboard just in case there were new developments but I figured no news is good news. The next day I waited until around 1pm to call and find out anything and was calm then too.

Thursday, the day of the procedure I was a mess. I wasn’t a sloppy mess, there was no crying or freaking out, but I was terribly unsettled - I couldn’t focus and was very restless. I wandered around the house looking for something to take my mind off of it but everything that was thought consuming I didn’t want to do. When I got the call that he was okay I was relieved but I had so much residual anxiety that I didn’t really calm down again until Friday – which is the day Dad went home.

We know that our parents are going to die. It is a fact of life and is unavoidable. I know this and yet I have never really given it much thought. Sure, being the type of person that I am, I have considered the logistics of the whole thing, but never the feelings. I know at some point I will have to move to California and take care of them and I have pondered the way life will be after they are gone. I have even gone so far as to imagine how we would feel at their funerals…but never their actual death. I have never thought about the process of their passing.

I am going to consider it a type of healthy avoidance and move forward. My dad is okay for now, and if he takes this warning shot across his bow to heart (heh, pun intended) I will have many more years to make sure he knows how important he is to me. But…just in case…I love you, Daddy…please stick around.

Much Thanks

2008-02-28T16:05:00.002-05:00

I am in the process of changing the look of my blog. As a control freak, everything must be perfect so I am still working out some of the crap I hate. At the moment, however, I am at a point that I can live with. I have to say 'thank you' to my friend Jerry. When I got to the code manipulation part he was available to talk Geek to me and help me get it sorted out.

In a while I will give an update on my dad. I want to get all the details first. Keep him in your thoughts though; he may need some good thought mojo to get him better.

Is There a Problem Here?

2008-02-27T19:25:00.001-05:00

Should it bother me that my cats are more popular than I am?

http://toughasstortiesassociation.blogspot.com/

Blankets, hot tubs, and near death experiences

2008-02-26T10:12:00.004-05:00

While we were in Vegas the last time (3 yrs ago) I fell in love with a store called Alpaca Pete’s. I had just spent $1200 on a couple of clocks at the time so I didn’t think it was a good idea to spend another $600 on a blanket. This time when we went to Vegas I hit Alpaca Pete’s before the clock store and found a blanket that I could live with. I really wanted the white one, but with 4 cats (only one of them white) I thought it best to go with a multi colored one. I got an oversized one and negotiated the guy down from $700 to $550. Additionally, I got free shipping and I didn’t pay tax (shhh). As soon as it arrived I opened it and put it on the bed…and the kitties HATE it. LOL. It must feel funny against the pads of their paws because they hop from the comforter to the pillows. If we place them directly on it, they don’t move until they find an escape route and then hop away. I have to say though, since we put it on the bed, we have more room because the kitties don’t sleep with us. Actually, that isn’t true…now they sleep on our pillows which is nice also. Now we have a fur blanket, and with using the kitties as pillows (hey, they don’t seem to mind) we have fur pillows also! I think the bed looks really…Disco 70’s now. It is a waterbed frame with a fur blanket on it…very Lounge Lizard. But OMG!!! Sleeping with this thing is like heaven. It is nice and warm (we drop the house to 60 degrees at night) and soooooo soft. It is like sinking in warmth. I had no idea how luxurious it would feel! And if I take a nap I sleep on top of it and pull up the comforter…heaven.

Alpaca Pete’s is in the mall at the Stratosphere and we were on our way to the tower when we ended up there. At the top of the tower, on the 108th floor, is the restaurant, the observation deck, and the rides. Michael and I went up for the ride while everyone else went to the observation deck to watch us idiots try to kill ourselves. I was fine with everything…until I sat in the chair. Up until then I didn’t give it much thought since we were just taking care of the logistics: buy tickets, wait in line, are we next? Walk up the stairs, go back and put glasses in the bin, get into seat, look down…Oh Shit! What was I thinking? At that point the kid operating the ride gives a maniacal laugh and wished us the best in the afterlife…and we are off. The ride itself wasn’t anything interesting…it was the plunging over the edge and hoping like hell the brakes worked that was so scary! It was over in about a minute and a half and I was REALLY happy to get off. I loved it though and wanted to hit the other ride that swings you over the edge but since they were having high winds it wasn’t open.

The winds really did a job on some of the hotels in Vegas. They were having freakishly high winds and apparently weren’t prepared for them. On the strip, the front entrance to the Miracle Mile shops was barred. They weren’t letting anyone out of that exit because the winds had damaged the signs on the Bellagio and the Paris hotel and shards of glass were whipping around everywhere. The next day we drove though before the repairs had begun and in the daylight things looked bad.

Once we got home and got settled I went to check the chemicals in the hot tub. I hadn’t checked them in almost 2 weeks and was fully prepared for the worst. As I suspected, the little strip said there were no chemicals in it so I started dumping crap in: algaecide, foam out, shock, clarifier, etc. I wasn’t even going to bother with the Ph levels until I got the rest situated, though I noted that I hade never seen the water so cloudy before…and…ewwww…there was unidentifiable stuff floating on the top. I got brave and went to scoop it out with my hands and got a shock…the water was c-c-c-c-o-o-o-l-l-d-d-d! That unidentifiable floating crap was ICE!! Great…now the hot tub needs to be repaired! I knew that Michael had been in the basement flipping breakers (a stove light issue) and suspected that he hit a wrong one. I had him go down and flip everything back…still no go. I hit the reset button on the outlet and Bingo! Power. It must have gotten tripped by all the rain we had been having. By last night the water was lukewarm to the touch so things are working. I was also concerned that because it got so cold that the hoses or pipes were damaged, but they are fine. Whew! So now I am planning on checking the chemicals again today and hopefully get it squared away so I can get in it tonight.

While I was working on the hot tub I was also taking care of a water spot on the wood floor. When the shower leaked it damaged a 3x3 foot area. I got some stuff to help blend the finish and some Feed and Wax and started to work on the spot. Yay! It worked. And fast too! I was done with the spot in about 30 minutes…and you can’t even tell where the water mark was. I was so impressed that I went around the house polishing all the wood furniture! I was a polishing fool! I have an antique vanity that someone was using as a plant stand ( I know, Idiot!) so I am planning on using it there next.

So I have covered all the topics I promised I would. And believe it or not they are all linked. The commonality? ME! Because, really, it is all about me.

To Vegas and Back

2008-02-25T00:23:00.001-05:00

Well, we made it back in one piece and we still have money in our pockets. The trip was nice but unless one is a big gambler or has never been to Vegas before, 8 days is too long to spend there. I absolutely hated to leave the Poodins for that long. It is funny how something you so take for granted leaves a huge gaping hole when they aren’t there. The first day back, I don’t think Autumn’s feet touched the floor. And when I did have to put her down she stayed attached to my ankle! Man! I love that cat!

The first leg of our flight left BWI at 8am and got to Atlanta…sometime. We had a 2 hour layover and then started the second leg of the trip. Our neighbor, Jackie, came with us and stayed at Planet Hollywood for 4 days. I have to admit that having her along made a long ride a bit shorter - Michael and I both had a great time picking on her. But now I don’t think she will ever travel with the Andersons again.

Once we got to Vegas we went to Planet Hollywood (PH) and hung out with Jackie for the afternoon. She went there on one of those timeshare sales pitch things. She got a great room, but in exchange she had to go to a sales meeting that lasted just long enough to suck the soul from her body and then had to promise to give them BRAAAIIIINNNNSSS (sorry, had a Zoombie moment there). And since we were in Vegas we had to eat at a buffet for supper. Good God! It was like sex with food - the mashed potatoes alone were climactic!

After supper we left Jackie and we went to our hotel. We had the golf package at Primm Vally Golf Resort so I was looking forward to seeing our accommodations for the week. Our rental car was a Charger so it was a nice ride to the resort and I could drive it around when Michael was golfing. Our room was nice if not a bit…common. We did have a nice bay window with a huge window seat though.

The next day my family wandered into town and we all met up with everyone as they came in. I have to say, that baby is just the cutest thing ever! What a great baby – he was happy the whole time and we played and played and played, and then he napped, and then we played some more. He gave me hugs and I don’t know what happened to me. I don’t know if it was the baby drool saturation level (turns out babies are…juicy) or that intoxicating baby smell but somewhere along the way I think I promised him a car. When he got over stimulated I gave him back to the parents and went shopping. Usually by the time I got back he was a happy boy again…or was it that I was a happy girl? Eh…either way, I got shopping done and played with a happy baby.

While we were there we also hit some shows. The second night we were there we went to see The Phantom of the Opera. We had seen it a few times before but the music always makes me cry. And we had great seats. We were in the second row in the orchestra, right smack in the middle of the row. We could see the actors sweat!! We also saw George Carlin and the last night we were there we went to see The Blue Man Group. Awesome!!

The day after we got home Merry Maids came by, the contractor came by, and we got a call from the realtor saying they wanted to show the house over the weekend. We spent most of the day Friday getting ready to show the house and taking care of little things like nail holes, touch up paint, etc. we got feedback from the realtor saying that the house shows well, so I am going to leave things the way they are now.

Well, I am going to get this posted so I can go to bed. I will post more tomorrow and here is a teaser for tomorrow’s post: it involves the Stratosphere hotel, an alpaca blanket, the hot tub and wood polish…and they are all related.

Anderson Luck Strikes!

2008-01-07T11:15:00.000-05:00

Well, the shower was finished for a hot second. The contractors left the house Saturday night at 9 and it was done! All we had to do was wait for the grout to cure and the mud on the new closet to dry and we could use them. Yippee!

Ahem...yes...that is how it was supposed to go...in a perfect world. In a world that doesnt include the Anderson Luck. A quick note about the Anderson Luck before I continue about our disaster: the Anderson Luck is a mostly unknown phenomenon that strikes Michael and me. Have you heard people claim that 'if we didnt have bad luck we wouldnt have any luck at all'? Well, it is kinda like that...but multiplied by 10. So anyway, to continue...

Michael and I get up Sunday morning to get ready to go to Indiana and I am in the process of feeding the Poodins when I hear dripping...I search for it but cant find it. I figure since it rained the night before the noise must be coming from outside. I go about getting ready for a road trip. Michael comes down and is puttering about and notices that the floor is wet. He looks up and notices that the beam between the small dining room and the kitchen is FULL OF WATER!! And it has leaked down both walls that the beam is attached to so now the paint has separated fromt the walls.

I called the contractor back and he was already on another job but swore he would send some one right out since I told him it was a bad leak. I think he thought I was exagerating but when his partner Jimmy got there he told Wayne (our contractor) that there was a lot of repair work that was going to have to be done. Wayne finished up his other job and he and Sonny got here about 7 pm and promptly started to cut holes in all the walls looking for the leak. They originally thought that when they installed the shelves that they hit a supply line with a nail, but after cutting into that wall, found that wasnt the case. Then they started checking the drain for the new shower which involved cutting holes in my small dining room ceiling. On the third try water poured down on them when they removed the sheetrock. Once they found the water they had to find out which pipe it was coming from. Back upstairs to the shower! After 7 cuts into the drywall in the closet they finally found the leak. Whew...it was something they did so they have to do all the repair work...and so it starts again. The Anderson luck...

My small dining room ceiling

Sonny checking the pipes in the dining room

The beam between the dining room and the kitchen...this was full of water and looked like one long balloon. When we drained it, it took almost an hour.

Another one of the beam.

The wall where the water leaked down...

The other wall where the water leaked down.

Progress!

2008-01-02T08:41:00.001-05:00

Wow...it is amazing how much can get accomplished with the right motivation! The house looks like a tornado hit it. Between the stuff that is getting put into storage, the stuff that we are keeping in the house, and the stuff that is going to Goodwill, it looks like we are a couple of slobs. We have been using a neighbor's truck to get stuff to storage and have already made 3 trips so far. I couldnt believe the amount of stuff
we had been accumulating in the bedroom downstairs! We cleaned that out and have made it into a library. We moved a couple of recliners down there and put the bookcases in there too. It is the most peaceful room in the house at the moment.

With everything going on I am surprised the kitties arent more psycho than they are. I think they are used to me moving furniture from room to room and they think this is just me being restless again. Heh...Yeah...I hope they keep thinking that until we shove their furry little butts in the Boxes of Doom and then pack the boxes in the Big Rumbly Machine for the next 10 hours. LOL.

I have posted pix of the disaster that is currently taking over my life. The pix are of the Formal Dining Room. It is normally the cleanest and least cluttered room in the house. Now we are using it as a catch all for the stuff to go to storage.

The window seat is being used as a catch all for the stuff that is going to Goodwill. I hope the guys dont get it mixed up and send our Goodwill stuff to our storage space.

The bathroom is almost finished. It has been a struggle the entire time. If the contractor shows up he only stays a couple of hours. The last few days though, he has been spending 4-5 hours here trying to finish the job. We are expecting it to be finished by the weekend. I know...I know...I have been saying that for weeks now, but he has 15 tiles, the windows, and the grout and it is finished. In fact, we asked him to come early today since we wont be here after noon and he showed up at 9. Trust me...this is progress.

The Realtor is coming tomorrow because we apparently need to be humbled - she is telling us what we should list the house at and what still needs to be done before it can go on the market. Ugh...not looking forward to that. But for as humbling and as frustrating as this all is...it is still better than Day +1 at the old office. Ha Ha.

Pissed

2007-12-28T09:13:00.000-05:00

Well, there are plenty of things to be pissed about. The top on my list is the contractor. My tile has been in for 2 weeks now and my shower is only half tiled. Wayne tells me that he will be here at 8, shows up at noon, and then only works an hour and leaves. I was really hoping to be able to use my shower before we moved out! I am giving him today to impress me or we are finding someone else to finish the bathroom up. I mean, really, we could do it ourselves since we have tiled before. We would just prefer not to since WE CONTRACTED WAYNE TO DO IT!!!

The house is a disaster. we have started boxing things up and taking them to the storage unit. We got a garage sized space since we will be putting furniture in there too. With all the de-cluttering going on, it is actually worse than if I had put everything where it belongs. We are making progress though. Now, things are getting cleaned out rather than just hiding stuff in cabinets and closets. The struggle isn't deciding what to get rid of, but in getting Michael to agree to get rid of ANYTHING. He is such a pack rat that if I say something has to go, he fights me all the way. My best bet is to clean out the place when he is gone. My thinking is that if we haven't seen or used something in 6 months then we don't really need it. Michael is hoping we get a place with a 3 car garage...I am cringing. I can just see all the useless tools and crap in there now!

Barry leaves tomorrow. That will help us de-clutter as well. As soon as he goes, we can start re-arranging the upstairs. We are turning our study into a small bedroom - that could be used as a nursery or a sitting area, since it connects to the master bedroom suite. My sewing room will become our office, and Barry's room will become the actual guest bedroom. The bedroom downstairs will become a sitting room/library, and the basement will stay the gym. Not a lot of re-arranging, but enough to keep us hopping for a while.

well, I just got off the phone with Wayne and he says he will be here before 10 so I am going to go and feed the Poodins before he comes. I will update later.

Bad Freak!

2007-12-20T14:04:00.000-05:00

Well, I dont think I am a good control freak. I mean, I have had this blog for 5 hours now and I am just now posting something. And the Template isnt making me happy, but if I were a good freak then I would have changed it by now and wouldnt be bitching about it.

The contractor is late... as in The Late Mr. Cathcart. He was supposed to be here at noon and now it is 2. The only thing left to do on this job is to lay the tile. How hard is that? I can do it but I already paid him for it and I am not going to be doing something I already paid someone else to do. We were discussing having him do some other work to the house, but now I am pissed and am going with someone else.

We are getting the house ready to put it on the market and there are a couple things I would like to have finished before we do so. One thing is we had some one come in and close up the attic access in the hallway because we had attic stairs installed in a different place. That area still has to be painted. The space where the current shower stall is is being turned into a closet so that has to be done still. And after we leave we are having some one come in and redo the hardwood floors. Oh, and we have to get the carpet cleaned also.

As a control freak this is pretty stressful for me. I mean, I love having everything all tied up and neat and moving just isnt any of that. There are so many details that have to be taken care of, and I adore that part...as long as everyone does what I tell them to do, and does it when I tell them to do it. But if things dont go as planned, I get pissed. Oh, and one of my nicknames is Miss Impatient...and not after the flower either.

So to sum up: I am a control freak, but not a good one. I am bossy. I am impatient. And I want everything my way...and those are my good qualities. ;)